Afterthoughts : This Past Month

This month was a bit unique, but not in a bad way.  Off we go to the update.

Saturday, April, 1, While looking at some pictures online a picture of my uncle Gil came up from 2013 when we went to the lake shrine in Malibu.  The reason why I bring this up is because of the jacket he's wearing.  It's a Harrington jacket.  It's the same jacket I have now, and the same color.  Why this jacket color and style?  Because of James Dean.  It's the jacket that James wears in the movie "Rebel Without a Cause."  I don't know why I didn't notice it before, but my uncle was wearing that jacket long before I started to wear it.  I wish he was still around to talk to him about the jacket and James Dean.

TheGirl and I heard about the Earl of Sandwich reopening at Downtown Disney a few weeks ago.  Then we heard that they were opening not just one restaurant but two.  The second would be called the Earl of Sandwich Tavern.  We said we should try it out, well today is the day.  But first we went to the Hearthstone Lounge for a drink.  I was kinda partial to just eating there, since they had a new menu with some interesting items such as a chorizo poutine.  That sounded so amazing.  Alas, TheGirl still wanted to try out the Tavern.  Well, we did, but neither of us thought it was as good as the regular Earl.  The sandwich menu is not included in the menu for the Tavern, which is a shame.  I would have liked to have booze with my regular Earl sandwich.  What I did order was a steak sandwich, and TheGirl ordered a club sandwich.  We both said they were good, but not even close to how good the regular Earl sandwiches are.  I was looking forward to having the holiday sandwich, which is basically a Thanksgiving dinner in the form of a sandwich.  Oh well, now we know.

Sunday, April, 2, I woke up early this morning, but I really didn't want to get up out of bed.  I had booze last night, and I jerked off until just past midnight.  Not only that, but my bed was warm and comfy.  So I finally got out of bed at 11:30am after getting to feeling hungry.  I ordered up some food from California Chicken Cafe after the McDonald's app failed to work... again!  CCC has better food anyway.  They said it would be ready at 11:45am, so I figured I had some time to shower and get there.  Sure enough I did.  I picked up the food at around 11:50am and came back.  I went to my aunt's room and she was fast asleep.  She doesn't sleep during the night, because she sleeps so much during the day.  Not good.  But, I was hungry, so I figured that I would eat without her, but why not have lunch outside.  The weather was absolutely perfect, and since I wasn't eating with her I could enjoy my backyard.  And that's what I did.  A few minutes past noon she popped her head out the back door and I told her that I went to see her but she was asleep.  And that was that, I finished up my meal outside and she went inside to eat.

There is a new anchor lady on the weekends on channel nine who is stunning.  I'm not sure how a human can be so beautiful.  The funny thing is I was trying to find out her name for the last few weeks, but they NEVER showed her name on the newscast.  I mean they ALWAYS show the names of the anchors as soon as they come back from commercial.  But did they do it when she was on the screen?  NEVER!  I finally googled something like "new anchor on weekend news."  And that did it.  I finally have a name to this goddess... Sheba Turk.

Monday, April, 3, I promised to met up with Stacie at the Brand library at 8am this morning for a special delivery of stuff to the "gas" station at Adams mini park.  That meant I needed to be at Central earlier than normal.  I'm not sure if that is what kept me waking up during the night.  But when I woke up at 5am I figured I would just stay awake and get my day started earlier.  It worked out, but I don't know why my body kept waking me up every couple of hours.  It was a restless night.

I had a special delivery today.  Yes, again.  This time I had to fetch some ladders and tools for Stacie and Chloe to install some things at the former gasoline station in Adams Square.  The station is now used to house some art displays.  It is what it is, I guess.  Anyway, I did that while weaving the route in-between.  As always, it's an adventure.

After the special delivery I went to circulation at Brand to use the rest room, and that's when I saw TheNewCute's plants on her desk.  The poor plants were SUPER dry.  I took it upon myself to soak them so that they wouldn't die.  I mean part of the reason why I care is because I bought her that one plant and I want to maintain it.  Even if she doesn't.

A couple of people asked if I had heard anything about the full time job, and I had to tell them I hadn't.  And the. They would look at me sideways wondering what was taking them so long.  This was followed by a, "I don't know why they don't just hire you," remark more than a couple of times.  Yeah, why not just hire me?  It's the elephant in the room to say I'm the one most deserving and qualified for the job.  So why didn't I get the Hendrick job, and why does it feel to me that I won't get this job?  I have some theories, but ultimately it comes down to the fact that they don't want me.  I've said it before, if they want you they will install you no matter what.  If you're the millionth on the list you're going to make the top three.

Obviously I don't know this for sure, but if by the end of this week I don't hear anything, or they give the job to someone else I'll know that I will have to look elsewhere for a chance at a full time job.  And maybe I just aged myself out of any chance at that.

I thought of submitting a couple of my works to the latest Brand call for art work.  I've never been able to get into the show, and the last time I put something out there it was just OK, not great.  The same goes for the work I created this year, it's not good.  But really I know that my work isn't what they're looking for.  No one is looking for my work.  I think it's time to just say good-bye to the idea that anyone will want to look at my work.

Perhaps I'm feeling down on myself because I feel that I won't get the job, and no one likes my art work.  Yes, that's it.  I do feel down because I would like these two things.  But at the same time, neither of those things will being me happiness.  I'm happy now.  I'm simply thinking of my future.  I want to be financially stable.  I want to go out and take great photos.  I know that popularity doesn't mean my work is good.  I suppose I just wanted as many eyes to see my work as possible.  If that's not going to happen then I should just stop trying to show the world my work and just keep it for myself.

Tuesday, April, 4, These are the last days at Casa for TheNewCute, for sure.  In the meantime we're having a good time working our last shifts together.  Today TheNewCute started at 8am, and by the time I arrived she had done all the holds, which is what I usually do on Tuesdays.  Cool.  Then we got all the bookdrop books, took out books that are no longer new from the new books, and much more.  We were super productive and it wasn't even 11am and we had done everything we needed to do.

By a fluke we ended up having our lunch at the same time, so we ended up watching the first half of the movie "Erin Brockovich."  So far, so good.  I'm pretty sure I'm going to stay on the route for the foreseeable future, so at least we'll get a chance to hang out on Fridays during our lunch hour.  I guess there are perks to not getting that full time job.

I was thinking about what my next move is after they announce that I didn't get the job.  I need to make some moves to either get a second job to supplement this job when my hours fall back to the normal twenty-five hours part time limit.  Of course I'll still look for full time jobs as well, because my future isn't so bright at Glendale.  I certainly don't have to worry about wearing shades.

It looks like Kvon is coming back soonish.  The assistant director sent out an email today (above) that plainly states that he's coming back.  The catch is that he's going to be downstairs in the basement where the IT department is.  He's now head of that department, like in the old days.  So he's back to where he started.  All things being equal I think it's the best thing that could happen.  He keeps his job, he's away from people, and he's downstairs where no one from administration will ever visit.  He can basically do what he wants down there and no one will care.  Again, it's not perfect, I'm not saying that.  However, the biggest thing is that he didn't get fired.  Now it's a matter of just when is he going to return?

Wednesday, April, 5, Yesterday I was talking to Ilsa via our preferred method of communication, that being the voice message feature on Facebook Messenger.  The other day she was mentioning how she is on a dating app.  She has met some real "winners," if you know what I'm saying.  I'll get into that later, if I remember.  Anyway, in response I told her how I didn't have the energy to follow through with the likes of Stacie for a relationship because I don't have the energy, or the inclination.  What I left out is that I don't want to live through being rejected.  I don't want to live through having a good thing only to have the other person tell you that they're not happy.  That they're not fulfilled.  That they're not in love with you.  And so logical me, one day, thought of how other's have faced this in the past.  Being a lover of the original Star Trek TV show I automatically thought of the Vulcan, Mr. Spoke.  Throughout the series he is thought to be cold, calculating and of course logical.  Because of that the fellow crew thought him to be emotionless.  Unfeeling.  A robot, perhaps.  Deep down inside, like the oceans of Europa, there was more to him which could be seen on the surface.  Inside raged a sea of emotions.  His people, we come to find out, were often engaged in war.  Savage war.  Until the day that one stood up and offered the Vulcans a different path.  Logic.  Ones and zeros.  Truth or false.  Ying and Yang, I supposed you could say.  And from that moment the Vulcans became a race of logical beings.

That is what I now strive for.  To not fall back on emotions.  Not not fall back on sentiment.  To just do the right thing.  Oh.  But wait.  Is logic the gateway towards doing the "right thing?"  I guess I'm going to find out on this journey.

Since it looks like Kvon isn't going to continue to be my supervisor, the question is now who is going to be my supervisor?  My money is on Nancy.  She was our acting supervisor while Kvon was out with a back injury.  To me that makes her the front runner.  But, I guess we shall see.

TheNewCute and I were having lunch at Grandview, a perfect time to watch the second half of the movie Erin Brockovich.  But we started a little bit late so we didn't finish the movie.  The subject of the movie came up because TheNewCute was watching some clips on social media and wanted to watch the movie.  It's not a terrible movie.  Good acting, on kinda a so-so story about a company poisoning ground water and by that the people of a certain town.  It's standard, nothing ground breaking.  I was even commenting that the movie was starting to get boring and that something needed to happen when almost instantly the movie transitioned into the third part of the second act, setting up the resolution and the third act.  But that's for another day.

I was talking to Junior, who informed me that Kvon's hearing was on GTV, aka the local public access channel.  That meant I could go online and see the information, since all this government stuff has to be accessible to the public. Sure enough I found the paperwork for his disciplinary hearing appeal.  They didn't say much, but it seems that Kvon wants to have the hearing, which will happen some time in June, to be public.  Wow!  I wish him good luck.

TheGirl and I often don't know where to go for our Wednesday dinners.  Tonight there was no doubt we were going to the Smokehouse.  I wanted a lemon drop for my drink tonight instead of my usual Manhattan.  I ordered up the dish and chips, which are pretty good here.  TheGirl ordered a salad and some wine.  It was good times.

Thursday, April, 6, Dealing with the craziness of Talia sometimes gets to me to the point where I just want to walk away and not deal with her ever again.  Today was one of those days.  She has this crazy idea that she wants to have a baby.  She lost her cousins to the court, because of her living conditions.  Which she says are fine.  Yeah, no, they're not fine.  I know how she lives.  She not only lives in a sty, but she lives hand to mouth collecting recycling out of trash cans like a homeless lady.  I honestly don't know how much Talia is worth, but the trust her brother and her have is the owner of at least five houses, including the one in WeHo where she lives and two up in Bel Air that I know of.  She's mentioned one in Westwood and another where her brother lives.  If she just sold one of them she would never have to worry about going out to the streets and picking up cans and bottles.  She's on the government dole as well.  She gets food stamps, mainly because her brother doesn't want her having any money.  I get it, she would probably spend it on stupidity.

But back to the baby issue.  She wants me to father a child with her in order to make up for the cousins she lost.  Now in the operation they told her they would have to remove her uterus along with the tumor.  The tumor must be connected to the uterus and it all has to come out.  She has this idea that she won't have the surgery done.  That taking vitamins will cure her.  No.  That's not going to happen.  Thankfully the tumor isn't cancer.  But even if she was to have the surgery and keep her uterus how viable is her uterus going to be to carry a child?  This is aside from her nuttiness.  It's not going to happen.  She is holding on to this baby hope because she has nothing else.  Her lifestyle is atrocious.  Humans should not be living like she lives.  Her home is a hoarder's paradise.  It smells like dog pee.  It's a fucking mess.

Today her statement about how vitamins will shirk her tumor just put me over the edge.  Even IF that were true, that doesn't mean she could have a child.  ARGH!

TheNewCute's days at Casa are coming to an end next week, so it sucks that she had to stay at Grandview today.  Her absence made for a quiet night tonight.  Super sucks.  But this is what I have to get used to from now on at Casa.  She belongs to Brand now.  I figure that I can do some photo editing on these quiet nights.  Oh well.  All good things come to an end.

I was winding down for the night when I checked my work email and found the above email.  In short there has been a delay.  What the fuck could be the delay?  I've said from the start of this that they didn't want me.  I've stated my reasons.  I'm not sure why they just don't offer the job to Reneh and have it at that.  I don't care about this full time job anymore.  I want to move on and start looking elsewhere.

Friday, April, 7, I asked Vagabundo if she got the email I got, after I shared the email with him.  I had to ask, because he didn't volunteer if he had received the same email.  I don't know why he's so secretive.  Anyway, he said that he didn't receive the same email I did.  Could that be because I'm the front runner?  Could it be because Mala probably forgot to email him?  Could it be that he's just lying to me?  I guess time will tell what's the deal.

I ended up submitting one Polaroid to the Brand show (see above).  I probably won't make it to the show, but I felt like I should enter something.  I was going to submit something else with the picture above, but I decided not to.

Saturday, April, 8, I was entering the bathroom in order to take a shower when I noticed my aunt had taken one of her pills and split it in half.  I asked her why she was doing that and she responded that the brill's were "bad for her."  I was so livid, and she could tell.  She tried to explain and I just told her I didn't want to hear it.  Later, when I was chilling in the backyard she tried to talk to me about it and I just told her I didn't want to hear about it.  I really wanted to tell her so many things.  Like how the next time she's in the hospital and they charge her a bill for something stupid like being out of network, or some other bullshit, that she came just figure that out without my help.  I'm tired.  I'm tired of her stupidity.  I've had to deal with it full force since my grandmother died almost twenty years ago.  I am done.  I am done caring.

I was asked to work tonight to help set up and monitor a reception for the Reflect Space gallery at the library tonight.  I didn't expect too many people to show up, but there was actually a good size crowd of about sixty people.

I pretty much stood around for three hours and I did about an hour of actual work at the end of the night.  It was easy money tonight.  I'll also be working next weekend, but that won't be as easy money.

Sunday, April, 9, Last night I set the washing machine to a delayed start so that it would wash my aunt's clothes at around 9am this morning.  Easy, right?  Wrong.  During the night my aunt went to the washer and added to it.  Not sure why she felt the need to do that at 3am, but she did.  In the process, of course, the turned off the timer.  The new washing machine is not immune to my aunt's silliness.  So this morning I had to turn on the machine manually just before I took a shower.

My aunt has been acting strange the last few days.  I mean she does some pretty stupid things, in my view, but it's like she's doubling down on the stupid.  I mentioned how she was splitting pills.  In general she's just been acting weird.  I don't like it.  It may be a symptom of a larger problem with her.

Today it was warm enough that I pretty much spent the entire day outside in my backyard.  But, not before I got my "chores" done.

I woke up early and jumped into action by first cutting my hair.  Then I got my aunt and I some food from Panada Express.  Everything else was closed due to it being Easter.  Following breakfast I flew out the door to go to the bank, followed by getting some gasoline and then visiting two markets to get what my aunt asked me to get.  After that I came home and just chilled.  I didn't even go out again for lunch, we just ate what we had in the fridge.

My cousin Nancy was asking me today about when my Grandmother and my Mother were born and passed away.  It's been so long since we celebrated my mother's birthday that I couldn't remember if it was the first of July or the forth.  It's the first.  My Grandmother I remember always changed her birthday date, because she didn't want to celebrate it.  So officially she was born in May, because that's what all her paperwork said.  But really we don't know for sure.  Strange how I remember the dates of when they passed.  Somehow that seems more significant to me now.

Monday, April, 10, My aunt didn't eat any of her noodles from the food that I bought her yesterday.  She literally just ate the vegetables, because it the chow mien wasn't Kosher.  Even though I checked online to make sure that they were Kosher for passover.  Where is my rolling eyes emoji?  Whatever.  I give up on her.

I had to rush through the route today, because of the fact that I was going to help return some of the art work from the last Brand show.  Shannon wanted me to go to Brand at 2pm, but that was moved up to 1:30pm.  That meant I had to really rush through the route.  I wanted to have enough time to have lunch as well.  But, I was able to get it all done before 1pm.  Then I went up to Brand to fetch Stacie and load up the art work to take to a few high schools.  That was the easy part.  We finished up early and we ended up talking after the milk run.  Stacie was telling me that she is feeling frustrated with her coworkers, since they have a clique that excludes her.  She's a person that gets things done.  The other two are more unmotivated, in her eyes.  I told her that the best advice I could give her is to just put her head down and do her job.  Later she did say that she was going to follow my advice.  Good.

Annie confirmed something I already knew was coming.  That being that Ann M., who worked upstairs in the processing room, was leaving San Marino for a full time job in Arcadia.  Ann has worked at Arcadia for years, but they recently offered her a full time job.  Good for her.  I had heard about a month ago that she was going to bail.  Well, now it's happened and I heard that Linda is having to work downstairs since they are so short.  Ha ha!

Tuesday, April, 11, I forgot to post this last week, but I was watching TV this morning as I ate my breakfast and saw Maria Q's hips and remembered that I made this gif of her sashaying her hips last week.  Amazing.

I busted out my Canon ELPH today and started taking pictures at Casa Verdugo.  The one above is of TheNewCute while she worked with me at the desk.  She's going to be leaving Casa at the end of this week, so I guess I wanted to just record her last days there.  *sniff*

This last picture was of TheNewCute in the kitchen as we watched videos on her computer.  We used to do that all the time at Casa.  It is weird how our lunches and scheduled were completely parallel today.  It's almost as if someone wanted us to have these final moments together at Casa.

TheNewCute and I also attended the all staff meeting today at Central together.  Of course the fucking meeting was completely useless.  As someone pointed out, the only people that talked were the ones that are new to the system.  The vets did not say a thing, because we've been there long enough to know that nothing is going to change.  We can talk until we are blue in the face and this library is not going to listen to our request or ideas.  It's simply not the way things happen at the library.

The new teen librarian is not winning over many people at the library.  I think she's nice, and I will add that I find her attractive.  Yes, that does bias me.  However, I do see what the rest of my coworkers are saying to me, that she, "Walks around like her shit don't smell."  In my interactions with her she comes off as someone sure of herself.  Nothing wrong with that.  But she literally walked right into this job having almost zero experience.  It's just because she is personal friends with DrDeath.  He was her professor.  A couple of people called her a "kiss ass."  She has a lot of ideas, not all of them bad, mind you.  What is the problem is that she thinks her ideas are original.  She just got out of library school so she's all enthusiastic about the job.  Fine.  But don't tell us that's worked here what we need at this library.  We need higher salaries, not stupid Maker Spaces no one uses.  We need a roof that doesn't leak.  Meanwhile the teen librarian is proposing roof top gardens.  Yes, that SOUNDS good, but with a leaky roof it's not the best of ideas.

Anyway, she's on many people's shit list already.  Ha ha!

The rest of the meeting was just a consulting firm asking us more questions and saying that they would be visiting the various branches.  I wonder just how much these firms are costing the city.  Someone pointed out to me that they firm themselves said that they were there to help with a plan in order to be able to use that plan to then turn around and raise funds.  Ah huh.  It's a money grab.

Wednesday, April, 12, Emma handed me her save the date card today while I was at Montrose.  I asked her if she had invited Junior, and she said no.  She did invite TheNewCute, but she didn't invite Junior.  I repeat that because Emma has known Junior since she was a child.  Emma has grown up at the library.  It's only fair that Junior go to the wedding.  I told her, "Junior has had a bad time as of late."  Then I mentioned how Junior's mother just died, and her long time relationship blew up last year.  Junior has been on a bit of a losing streak.  To not be invited to Emma's wedding would be a slap in the face.  But, before I left Emma said she was going to send Junior a save the date card.  I'm glad.  This was my good deed of the day.

Today's special delivery involved going to the Adams park gasoline station to take down the display that was put up last week.  In tow was Stacie.  I know, we've been spending a lot of time together doing these special deliveries.  She said she likes the time, and she even bought me a lavender and English breakfast tea thingie from a place right across the street from the gasoline station.  The lavender tasted good, too bad there wasn't enough of it in the drink.  Ilsa says I should ask Stacie out.  As always, I'm afraid.  of getting shot down.  And then I also worry what a relationship with any one means to my Wednesday night dinners with TheGirl.  To me those are special.  Why can't it be simple?

TheGirl mentioned that she was craving Mexican food, so we went up to our new favorite Mexican restaurant in Burbank... Don Cuco's.  I went ahead and ordered some sopes, which really hit the spot tonight.  They sat us down inside, like last time, which means Cheyenne gets to be inside as well.

Wednesdays are the day I look forward to the entire week.

Thursday, April, 13, Today is the for real, absolutely will happen, last day for TheNewCute at Casa Verdugo.  We've been saying good-bye to her for nearly a month since she was told she got the full time job at Brand.  This one is for real, as I said before.  It was a good day.  I know I'm going to miss our time, but it's not good-bye for me.  Not completely.  I'll still see her on the route.  However, as I've said before we had a unique work relationship in which we worked on the desk together for nearly two years.  All good things, right?  Who knows what the future holds.  Perhaps we'll work a desk together again some day.  Perhaps not.  Just like the time of the pandemic, when it were locked down, was totally unique and will never happen again.  So this time with TheNewCute was unique and will probably never happen again.

At one point TheNewCute had my phone, and since taking pictures is just a swipe away she started taking selfies, like the one above.  Cool beans.

TheNewCute is always wanting to hit me, she says.  Today she kicked me.

We were setting up the speaker and found that some dope had entangled the speaker wire.  TheNewCute was trying to untangle the wire while I tried to entangle her in the wire.  Ha ha!

Oh yes, there was a dance performance tonight.  In my mind the performance took a backseat to TheNewCute, but I will say that the performance was really cool.

As we were getting ready for tonight's performance there was a moment where we gathered in the community room in a circle and we said some words about TheNewCute.  I wanted to burst out in tears, so I just gave her a chokehold hug.  She's like my kid sister.  I want to look out for her, because the world is fucked up.  TheNewCute is always saying she wants to punch me, because I have a punchable face.  Today she said she wanted to punch me because she, "Likes me so much."  Ditto.  She's a special one.  She's a good kid sister.  My Thursday night's at Casa won't be the same.

Friday, April, 14, I went up to Brand after having lunch at Grandview since TheNewCute was there today.  It's her last day there.  Anyway, I got up to Brand and went looking for Stacie.  When she saw me she immediately said to me, "I can't go with you to the high school."  She further explained that if she left with me to drop off the student artwork the other two in her crew would not do any work.  I told her that was fine.  I mean I like the small time I spend with her delivering or picking up stuff.  Yet, I am capable of delivering this stuff by myself.  Especially this art work, which was small ceramics and framed photos.  But, who wouldn't want to spend time with a nice lady?  I did miss out on my face time with Stacie.  There's always the next project.

Last week when I went to pick up the artwork there was a pretty art teacher at the high school.  Well, I saw her again today.  I love lady's hips, and she has some nice ones.  I also love her hair.  She's going gray, like me, and owning it.  I mean she looks so nice.  I got to know her first name thanks to the fact that Stacie added me to a text chat.  Allison.  After that, finding her online was easy.  She's an artist, and has her MFA in photography.  Now, how do I date this lady?  Ha!

Saturday, April, 15, My gig for today was at Central, which had an event going on.  The event was celebrating Armenian History month.  I was given the extraordinary assignment of being in the auditorium.  That's it.  I was given no other directive.  I was just told to be in the auditorium.  It was the easiest money I'll make this week, that's for sure.  Oh, and because I'm over my forty hours for the week today's hours are overtime!

I had a bit of a break to get something to eat, but dummy me forgot to bring something to eat with me.  I know, good work.  I figured I could get a hot dog, so I searched for a place near the library that carried hot dogs on the menu.  Well, that only close place was Shake Shack.  I went there years ago, and found it to be just meh.  I figured I could get a hot dog, because how do you fuck up a hot dog?  Well, they somehow did.  The dog was tasteless.  They put some cheese sauce on it, which tasted pretty good.  Then came the fries, which were also meh.  I originally thought of just getting the hot dog, but when I walked in they had advertised a Korean BBQ burger that looked good.  I wanted to try it but the lady at the counter said they were all out.  OK.  They also were advertising Korean BBQ fries, but she told me they were all out of those too.  Hence me just getting the hot dog and fries.  That and a "large" Coke cost me $14.41.  Yeah, total rip-off.  Never again.

My aunt told me today that she was wondering if I could move the TV from the kitchen into the living room so she could watch TV there while doing some exercises.  That's cool.  I told her that we didn't have to move the kitchen TV because I had an extra TV in my room that my buddy Dane gave me.  And sure enough it fit perfectly in one of the slots in this piece of furniture that we've had for over forty years.  My mom, I guess, bought it back when we were still at the apartment.  I know, because I have pictures to prove it.  Anyway, I installed the TV and thankfully it uses remotes that we have in the house.  Dane didn't find the remote when he found the TV.  I programmed it and now we have a mini TV in the living room.

Sunday, April, 16, I went to the market wanting to get some ice cream.  Once there I found that they had a trio of new Reese's brand ice cream novelties.  I picked the cone one, but they had an ice cream sandwich and an ice cream bar.  Overall it was OK.  Nothing that amazing.

I was sitting in my backyard writing some stuff when I noticed a hummingbird flying really close to me.  I tried to get some pictures, but hummingbirds are super fast and they don't stay in one place for very long.  I snapped the above photo, along with others.  This one is the best one of the bunch.

My old supervisor from San Marino, Becks, showed up on my social media today looking really nice.  Apparently she and her friends went to the Taylor Swift concert and they all dressed up nice.  Becks has a nice figure.  I miss working with her.  She was super nice and chill.

Monday, April, 17, I had lunch at Brand, since that's where I tend to have lunch when working with TheNewCute.  But, today Brand isn't open, so she wasn't around.  So, I figured I would eat by myself and have a good time at lunch while eating in the main library.  It is something I did during 2020 when we were isolated.  I think about those times and how it really felt like being the Omega man.  I mean, I would see people from the windows, but I couldn't interact with them.  In a way that was a good thing.  Today I wasn't alone in the building though.  The art installers, including Shannon and Stacie, were in the gallery.  You know, I find both of them attractive.  Shannon has a beautiful face with amazing eyes.  Stacie had a beautiful face and a kicking body.  Not that either of them want me, but IF, big if, I had any chance with either of them it would be difficult to choose.  But dummy me doesn't have to worry about that.

Tuesday, April, 18, The office printer doesn't work at Casa.  The manager there told me that it's been on the fritz since yesterday.  I can't print my holds off that printer.  This fucking sucks, mainly because I rely on that printer so I can print out the holds for the day.  Without that printer I can't print out the holds.  I have to rely on other methods that are not as effective.  Like in this case I had to do a screencap of the program and then print out the screencap to the public printer via the printer page on the library's website.  ARGH!

Like yesterday I had my lunch alone, but this time my lunch was at the Casa branch.  No TheNewCute in sight.  Sigh.

having my walk during my lunch hour.  I haven't had a chance for a while.  It was a near perfect day for a walk.  I quickened the pace today, and I did nearly a mile and a half in about 25 minutes.  My big belly really needs to go away, and I'm hoping that a brisk walk a couple of days a week will help me lose a couple of pounds.  I mean, I'm not expecting any miracles.  I do feel good when I have my walks.  They energize me and give me a chance to listen to my audiobook.

DrDeath sent out his once in a while all staff email.  In it was the above picture along with the following words:

Last week was Selena's last time covering shifts at Casa/Grandview.  Thank you for all your help and contributions to the Casa/Grandview Team Selena!  We wish you the best of luck as you make your move to join the team at Brand!

I sent TheNewCute a text saying she looked like "Such a dork," in this picture.  She texted back, "LMAO so awkward."  To say the least.

I joked with Vagabundo that this is TheNewCute's twenty-fifth farewell party/email notice.  It's like we've been saying good-bye to her for a month.  TheNewCute is kinda special in all our hearts.  She's been at Glendale for four years.  In that time she's become part of our work lives in a signifiant way.  I hate to say it, but I partially don't want to get the full time job because I feel it means I won't be driving the route anymore.  Which ultimately means I won't see TheNewCute at least a few times a week.

Wednesday, April, 19, TheNewCute ordered a book through Link Plus and I saw it in one of the bins going up to Brand.  I went ahead and wrapped a few rubber bands around it, but on second thought I should have wrapped a lot more rubber bands around the book.  Like nearly cover it with rubber bands.  Next time.

Things are back to nice since I had lunch at Brand with TheNewCute.  We didn't watch anything because the other Shannon was in the lunch room waiting for her food to arrive.  I don't know how people afford having food delivered to them all the time.  TheNewCute ops for delivery all the time.  She did say that she usually orders from places that have small or no fees.  Nevertheless, food from eateries can rack up fast.

After lunch we both went downstairs to look for the CD polisher, so that they might start using it again to fix the scratched CDs at Brand.  TheNewCute was telling me how at the video store she used to work for they had a little machine that took the scratches off the DVD/CD.  The one she showed me on Amazon was WAY smaller than the one they have at Brand.  And it seems less complicated.  I hope they buy that little one TheNewCute suggested, because that would be easier than the larger one and she said that it's faster.  Nice.

I went over to Adams and they were telling me more John stories.  John was fired for just being a big dope.  The latest story is that he asked Michelle B. what her salary was.  Then when she said she wasn't going to tell him he says, "That's OK, I'll just check Transparent California."  As public workers our salaries are a matter of public record.  Also, the other story is that he failed his drug test when they hired him.  The new girl, Cindy E, said that he must have made a convincing argument against it.  She said that he mentioned to the city that marijuana is legal in the state.  Yes, this is true.  But I think the city still has discretion in such matters as drug use.  They obviously thought he made a good point since they did hire him.  But he sure put his foot in it after that.

Emma told me early in the day that she had Junior's safe the date card for me to give her.  I told her I would personally hand it to Junior.  Sure enough, when I got back to Central I went straight to Junior and gave her the card.  She was quite happy, and it made me almost want to cry.  As stated in previous entires, Junior has had a hard time lately.  The last couple of years have been rough on her.  Especially with her mother being sick and dying.  As soon as she saw the date she reached over to get her calendar and put the date in it.  Good deed, completed.

There is someone at one of the Link Plus other libraries that has been drawing cartoons on the routing stickers.  See, when a patron returns an item that's going to a fellow library system we are supposed to take a marker and put an X on the sticker to denote that it needs to return to its home system.  Well, this person at the Alameda library system has taken it upon themselves to be a bit of an artist and add some flare to the returning items by drawing some cute scenes.  Here are some of the newest ones.

And then it was time for the best thing of the week, Wednesday night dinner!  Tonight TheGirl and the gang (Cheyenne and Chan) went to the Smokehouse in Burbank for dinner.  I didn't like the burger I was served last time, so I asked them for something I know they make good there... the Reuben.  They charge $4 more if they serve it during dinner time.  Not sure why the price changes during the day.  I'm sure it's the same sandwich they make at 2pm.  Whatever, it's better than the burger, and the alternatives.

Thursday, April, 20, When I was having lunch with TheNewCute yesterday at Brand I assembled my tuna sandwich.  I piled it on high, to the point that TheNewCute said the tuna will fall out of the bottom of the sandwich.  It didn't quite happen that way.  However, she did mention that I should treat it more like toast than a sandwich by spreading the avocado on the two slices of bread and then the tuna like an open face sandwich sort of thing.  Well, I tried that today and it was pretty good.  Good job, lunch hack by TheNewCute.

It was just past 3pm when Mala called to say that she was sending William over to cover our breaks at 4pm.  He can't make it before then.  The new girl that works with me at Casa is now forced to be on the desk with me since TheNewCute left for Brand.  I tell her that we will take our breaks after 4pm today because we are shorthanded.  Gitmo said he wasn't feeling well, so he went to urgent care ad left me along with the new girl.  I tell her that we'll take our breaks after 4pm, so that when he arrives he can man the desk.  She tells me, "I usually take my break at 3:30."  Well yes, but that's not what I'm saying.  She seems to get it when I explain to her why we need to take our breaks after 4pm.  She repeats herself and tells me that she is going to take her break at 3:30pm.  Where is my rolling eyes emoji.  Whatever!

I'm just waiting for 7pm.  I was texting TheNewCute, but she's gone into radio silence when I needed her the most.  My cohort on the desk tonight is just reading her book.  *sigh* I've resorted to looking for places to eat on Monday.  TheGirl is going up to Universal CityWalk on Monday to see the Mario movie.  Which means I am left to my own devices.  And since I am I am able to go to get something to eat that I normally wouldn't have time for.  I've narrowed it down to a place in NoHo called Urban Skillet.  I mean, for now I have.  I still may change my mind between now and then.  I should go to that wine bar in Burbank where that woman with the amazing body works.  Ahhh, she probably quit already, or doesn't work on Mondays.  Blah!

We suddenly got busy, with one guy leaving and being replaced by two ladies.  One went to use the computer and the other was picking up her books.  The sun is still up high in the sky.  I may still have enough time for some backyard time.

I know I post a lot of these old photos of Talia, but I guess I'm a little nostalgic about how she was when I first met her.  This one is from 2004, when we were both going to Santa Monica College.  She was texting me that someone left her some Lebanese Armenian Easter cookies called Kaigh.  She mentioned that someone left them at her door.  How cool.

Friday, April, 21, I replaced TheNewCute.  Well, I replaced her on the Casa employee shelves.  Vivian has given all of us that work there our shelf, so that we can have some of our things.  Yesterday she asked if I wanted to move up one spot, because that would make the shelves more evenly spaced.  I said yes.  Well, that meant good-bye to TheNewCute's shelf.  She won't be back, so she doesn't need her own shelf.  So yeah, I "replaced" TheNewCute, in a way.  *sigh*

All of us got a bag along with a note from the administration team.  I get that some people in this organization are not well known to the gang upstairs.  However, there are some people that they know go above and beyond.  I feel I'm one of those people that they should know better than generic.  Well, I got my note and it was completely generic.  But, whatever!

I was on my way up to Montrose when I got a text message asking if I was on my way up there, because a patron called to say that the front doors were open.  Sure enough, when I got to the library the front door was unlocked and all the lights were on.  I closed up shop before leaving, of course.  It would seem that the cleaning crew was the ones that left the lights on and the door unlocked.  I made a joke about the doors being open in reference to Chevy branch supposedly being "automated," by saying that Montrose was introducing so-called "Choice hours."  Which is what they call the automated entry at Chevy.

I was looking through a book about ads from the 70's.  I looked through it and found this ad for adult video tapes.  It's hard to see in the picture above, so if you click on the picture you can see the full size ad.  In that ad the tapes were selling for $99 each.  EACH!  Sorry, $99.50.  EACH!

Saturday, April, 22, Krishna asked me to work today because she was going to have her crew work the Earth Day event today.  But, it turned out she didn't really need me today.  She actually had too many people working after all.  This made for a really chill shift today.  I didn't do much.  Not until the end of the day when I was put to work helping break down the canopies.  That wasn't so bad, especially considering I am getting paid overtime.  Oh, and other great thing is that I worked inside, because it was way warm today.

I was told today that TheLooker was at last week's Armenian celebration.  I didn't see her, but did she see me?  Not that I'm afraid to run into her, but I do wonder what I would say to her for flaking on me last year.  Part of me knows that I won't confront her, since that's not my style.  What if she bring it up though?  Will I have to say something to the effect that, "You're the one that didn't respond to my text messages." 

Sunday, April, 23, It was twelve years ago that I had the ultimate pleasure of photographing TheDesire.  I don't remember the details of how I asked her to pose, but obviously she agreed.  We went up to the abandoned zoo ruins in Griffith park, because it's a neat backdrop.  I wrote something about that day on my website.  To quote myself:

I have these photos to record a moment in time.  The moment when she was perfect in my eyes.  The moment when she was timeless.  The moment when everything was possible, even spending the rest of my life with her.  It was a time when I was drunk in my desire.

I remember that a time after that day I got bold and asked her if she would pose nude.  She declined.  Sad.

I received an email from Jack in the Box telling me that for 420 they were going to have something called the Pineapple Express shake.  I know that's in reference to a movie, and also marijuana.  I just love pineapple, so I HAD to get it.  It was good.  I hope they keep it on the menu, but they won't.

There's a pretty lady that works at the market's self checkout lane.  She has a pretty face and a gorgeous derriere.  I've wanted to get a photo of her so I could post it here for context.  Ideally I would love to ask her out, but I don't want to be "That guy" that asks ladies at their jobs.  That comes off as creepy. 

Monday, April, 24, The morons that run this library system decided to try to "automate" the Chevy Chase branch, because it is by far the least visited site in the system.  They tried to close it down years ago, but couldn't.  The reason was that supposedly the residents of that area wanted to keep it open, and that the council member that represented that area wanted to keep it open.  OK.  All these years later the place is still like a leach on the system, because so many resources get committed to it in order to keep it going.  Artificially keeping it going, mind you.  It's only open two days a week, and I know from working there that there are almost always more employees than actual patrons.

A few years ago they thought to automate the library, whatever that means.  There are automated libraries all over the world.  Some are much like a collection of lockers that have the book for a patron in a little locker accessible by their library card.  Some others have doors that let people into an empty library that you are trusted to not burn down.  I mean, it would be rather stupid, since you have to register for the privilege of accessing the library while there is no one there.  Over four years and $2,000,000 later they have finally opened up the Chevy Chase automated library.  They call it "Choice Hours."  And it is, like I said, yet more of a commitment of resources on a branch that should just be closed.

My part in this that these idiots have been sending hundreds of books up to Chevy to "Refresh" the collection.  Now hear this, as you read this... NO ONE CHECKS OUT ANY BOOKS FROM THAT LIBRARY.  It has a tiny collection of adult books.  I'm pretty sure if you walked in there with a random idea of what kind of book you wanted that they wouldn't have it there.  So this so-called "refresh" is just lip service.  They made Tony and me move something like thirty-five bins of books up there to add to that collection.  They certainly had the room.  But think of that location as more like storage, because I've never seen anyone come in and get a book they wanted from that location.  Children's books are a different thing, because often parents just grab any old book to read to their kids.  I'm talking about the adult collection.

The wishful thinking is that I don't know, hundreds of people would sign up for the special privilege of using the library when there are no employees in sight.  But only thirty people have signed up.  Two million dollars for thirty people.  That's a great use of resources.

The icing on the cake is how they kept sending books.  Even after the manager there said to slow down.  I'm sure half the stuff they sent up there came back to Central.  I know a lot of the teen books did.  It looks like my days of having to lug bin after bin up to Chevy because the manager at Chevy said that they were, "Done."  Here is what she said in her email to the Children's librarian at Central.

We are done!  All items were scanned, Sherry went through all of the other call number ranges as they came in, and Antonio finished shelving them on Saturday. Please view the attached photo.

I added the photo at the top to show you how pristine the shelves are.  BTW, yes, they took this photo after they finished, but that's what the shelves ALWAYS look like.  Fucking idiots.

I usually go over to TheGirl's on Mondays as a tradition that started when we were dating.  I would work at Montrose on Monday evenings and she lived up the street from the library.  So she would often walk up to the library and then I could take her home and we would hang out a bit before I would go home.  It was good times.  There are times when she is out of town, or doing something with her family, that I don't go over for a visit.  Today I didn't visit because she went with her family to see the new "The Super Mario Bros. movie."  She went with her son, her daughter, her son's wife and her grandchild.  As I write this I haven't asked her what she thought of the movie.  I just texted her.

(a few moments later)  She said I was "Cute."

Since TheGirl "ditched" me tonight I figured I would treat myself to something different to eat.  I usually go to McDonald's after work and before I go to TheGirl's for our Monday visit.  But, today I went to Casa Vega in Sherman Oaks.  It's a famous Mexican restaurant that I've driven by a "million" times, but have never visited.  Well, I can finally say I went.  It wasn't bad.  I ordered the sopes, which were good.  I really loved the refried beans.  The rice was good, but nothing ground breaking.  The margarita was weak sauce though.  And not only that, but this place was expensive.  I walked out of there having spent $47.79!  My margarita was $16, but they discounted $3 for happy hour.  Yeah, no.  I tried it... I can say I've been... but I don't think I'll come back here for a long time... if at all.

I sent Talia a text telling her that her birthday is tomorrow.  She didn't remember.  Hmmmm.

Tuesday, April, 25, Today's shift at Casa Verdugo was pretty chill.  I mean, there were hardly any patrons around and I had nothing to do all day.  Thankfully it also didn't go slow, like last Thursday.  I'm dreading this coming Thursday, because I'll be there until 7pm with a coworker that does her own thing and doesn't talk much.  I tried to do some writing last week, but it wasn't working out.  This week I think I'll try again and also do some photo editing.

Speaking of today, the scheduling is a little off.  I'm there until 5pm on Tuesdays.  Before TheNewCute would be there until closing with this guy named Alex.  He would arrive at 4pm and I was on the desk with him until 5pm, when TheNewCute would come out from the back office and take over at 5pm.  She and Alex would be there until closing after I left.  But now Zehlia is coming in at 3pm and Alex at 4pm, which means from 4pm to 5pm we have three people for a desk built for two.  So now I'm the odd man out for the last hour of my shift.  Hey, I'm OK with getting paid to do nothing, but it's kinda strange the way the scheduling since TheNewCute went to Brand officially.  I assume that Gitmo is having Zehila start at 3pm to make it worth her while to show up for four hours rather than three.  But maybe then let me go home at 4pm.  I don't mind, but that would impact me in that I would be working thirty-nine hours a week and not forty.  Big deal.

Anyway, today I had two hours "off desk" hours, which for me is kinda silly since I don't have any projects to work on.  But, I'm not going to look easy money in the mouth, so to speak.

Talia turns forty-five today.  I went ahead and made and printed a photo for her birthday (see above).  The picture was originally taken back in August 2003.  We had just met a few months before, and I told her I wanted to take her photograph.  She was great, because she was gun ho about posing for me.  I have taken many photos of Talia over the years, but this one is pretty cool because of the pose and her smile.  It's pure joy.  I will have to ask her what her thought was at that moment, despite the fact that it was twenty years ago.  I hope she remembers.

Talia was so pretty back then.  She was a little nutty, but nothing like today.  I still have affection for her, all these years later.  She was the first woman in so many of my "check lists."  She was the first girl that posed nude for me.  That's a milestone.  I know things wouldn't have worked out for us in the long run, but I'm glad that I'm still her friend.

I have been taking photographs for more than thirty-five years now.  Ever since high school.  In that time I believe I've gotten good, but not great.  I feel that I need to step up my game and reach the level of "great."  The question is, how does one become great at anything?  What's the old saying, how do you get to Carnegie Hall?  Practice, practice, practice.  I have put in my 10,000 hours, and more.  There is something else I have to figure out.

Wednesday, April, 26, I was perusing social media when I came across the San Marino library feed.  They posted some pictures of my coworkers, because it was National Library Workers Day.  More like morgue workers, by the look on everyone's faces.  I texted the pictures to TheNewCute and she said it right, "They look like hostages."  Amen.  Poor saps.  I do like the new blue shirts they have on.  I asked Annie to get me one.  Ha ha!

TheGirl and I went to Wood Ranch for dinner tonight.  I ordered up a Buckeye burger, and it was super yummy.  I was craving a burger and tonight it really hit the spot.  I think next time we go I'll get the same burger, but perhaps try a different side dish.  I absolutely loved the bacon.

There was a point where I was taking pictures of Cheyenne and she gave me side eye.  She has never liked me taking her picture.

Thursday, April, 27, I forget how I got to Flickr exactly, but there came a point in the day where I was checking something about CSUN and the next thing I know I'm on Flickr looking at an old picture of Wayne (my old boss from CSUN) and me.  I remembered there used to be a pretty librarian that Wayne called the "Machinery," because of the way her hips moved, that took that picture of us.  Well, that led to my account, because she linked me.  So now it was time to try to recover that account.  Sure enough, I tried my Kelic email address and that didn't work.  But I tried another email and boom, I was on my page.  It was strange because I guess I was still posting stuff up to 2016.  Crazy.  I know I found some good folks on Flickr back about fifteen years ago.  But none of the people I follow really stayed on that page.  Most, if not all, migrated to Instagram.  But I liked Flickr a lot in the past.  One cool thing is that they had the actual size image online.  You were shown a preview, but if you clicked on the preview you could see it in the actual resolution and even download it.  If the person posting it allowed that, of course.

Flickr reminds me of that past internet that existed before the current social media rich present existed.  It seems quaint now.  I remember using Tripod to build one of my first websites.  I also remember using Geocities to build what was the predecessor of this American Ecstasy website.  Which makes me think of the people I knew back then.  One that came to mind was a girl named Lori.  She was nice.  I became friends with her via Diaryland.  She was shacked up with her baby daddy.  She had come from a busted house where she was molested by her father.

Lori was cool, but as with so many people I lost track of her.  The last time I commuted with her was not a pleasant thing.  One night, while drinking most likely, I deleted her from my Facebook contacts.  Boy, did she give me an earful via message.  She was one of many girls on the internet that I thought was attractive, but who wouldn't give me the time of day.  But maybe she would, because she did send me nudes of herself.  But, part of that could have been because of her molestation.  I don't know, it's water under the bridge now.

My coworker Katie, from Casa, gave me a disposable Kodak camera.  Sadly when I opened it up the battery had corroded, and whatever that is that comes off a battery like that was all over the camera.  Which means it's useless, because I'm sure what's coming out is also all in the inside of every part of the camera.  Including the film.  Womp, womp.

Today's shift at Casa went pretty slow, but then the fun started when a lady from Bubblemania showed up.  Then things got loud, but it also made the time go fast.  When the lady left it was about 6:15pm already, so that meant less than an hour until I left.  And that time went fast.  Super glad.

Friday, April, 28, Vivian asked me if I could help her set up and bring down the items she uses for story time in the park.  Sure, I told her.  This was asked of me months ago.  Sure enough the day finally arrived and we met up at Nimbly park, in the really nice neighborhood in Glendale.  While there are bigger homes up the street, this area where the park is is definitely upper middle class.  They are nice but modest houses.  Anyway, the story time was well attended, but I didn't really have to do much.  It was chill.  Just how I like it.

I got a text from TheNewCute at one point in the morning telling me that she was going to leave at 1pm today, so no lunch.  Oh well, I have to stop relying on TheNewCute to be my lunch companion all the time.  She got to leave early today because she worked on her day off (Monday).  That's fine.  I decided that I wasn't going to wait until I got to Brand to have lunch, since she wasn't going to be there.  I went to Troy's burgers and picked up a pastrami burger, some fries and an Orange Bang.  I had my lunch at Adams, since it was such a nice day and it was the closest location to Troys.  Yeah, not having lunch with TheNewCute kinda sucked, but it's fine.

When I finally did get to Brand I noticed TheNewCute's plants were dry.  The ones that our coworker Shannon got here were the most dry.  The one I got her was not bad, but I did want to add more since I wouldn't be there to water it until Monday.  The orchid they gave TheNewCute when she left Grandview was also on the dry side.  So all three got water today.  Meanwhile TheNewCute is a plant killer.  100%

Here we go again.  For some reason Mala insists on taking our temperature.  Which is silly because we all do our work, day after day, without anyone having to poke or check in on us.  We do it because that's how we are in that group.  The Circulation department probably has the lowest turnover of people of any department.  Reference people are upwardly mobile.  They have their Masters degree and by that they can get jobs in a lot of places.  But the gang at Circulation don't all have degrees, so they are less able to just up and get a new job.  They are also of a certain age, which means they can't move around.  In short, we're stuck.  I include myself in that, because I believe that I aged out.  They didn't give me the Brand job for many reasons, one of them probably being my age.  TheNewCute is half my age.  Same goes for this current job that I won't get.

Anyway, we don't see why we have to be scrutinized like we are by Mala.  Let us just do our job.  We may be miserable, but we'll do it day after day without any intervention.  But Mala is a micromanager, so it's not in her nature to just let the department run itself.  Whatever.  Maybe this is so she looks like she's doing something, who knows.

I was talking to a friend about the pending writer's strike, and he said to me, "I don't care since I don't watch any TV these days anyway."  Yeah, I know what he means.  I don't really watch any shows on TV or on streaming.  I mostly watch YouTube these days, or older content that's online.  TheNewCute's boyfriend works in the industry, but she says he has a nest egg.  I don't remember how long the last strike was, but I hope they get what they are asking for.

Saturday, April, 29, As I write this sentence it's nearly 2pm and there are two patrons in the building.  One is a man waiting for his wife, who is doing I don't know what.  Oh well.

(later at home) I don't think that we had thirty people show up today.  Which is fine by me.  I like making easy money.  And today was time and a half.  Woo hoo

Sunday, April, 30, I had only four days off this month, so it's no surprise that I slept nearly all day today.  In between my many naps my aunt was hassling me with her dumb question.  Over and over again.  First it was something about a medical bill from last YEAR.  I don't remember last week, let alone last fucking year.  There were more questions, but I don't want to think about that right now.

My neighbor's son's room is about twenty feet from my front door.  Lately that son has been spending time with his buddy in the area right out his room.  That's because he has his own door to the backyard.  This morning, after arriving from the market I noticed a strong urine smell coming from that back door.  I don't know why my neighbors are doing this.  Before this they were smoking like chimneys.  With the weather getting warmer they will likely spend more time in their backyard, which means more smoke smell in my yard, and more sounds of coughing.

I wish I had another day off.  I can't wait for Saturday.  Part of me thinks I should go somewhere instead of staying here at home, so I won't have to deal with my aunt.

Santa Barbara comes to mind, due to it being close enough that it can just be a day trip.