Afterthoughts : This Past Month

The above is a screen cap of my April 2011 Elsewhere entry.  That's really the first time that I started trying to write daily in this journal.  It's no coincidence that that was the time that I was getting more serious with TheGirl.  I wanted to record those moments.  This month back in 2001 I posted my first Elsewhere journal.  Who knew that twenty years later I would still be doing this.  Here's to the next twenty years.

Let's get this update started.

Sunday, August, 1, It's been weeks since I went to the market with my aunt.  She's really slowing down these days.  We got in the car and rolled over there.  When we got there she says, "Where's my purse?"  Jeez.  She tells me, "I'm ready," when we're at home.  But then she goes ahead and forgets her purse.  I feel bad, because it must be frustrating to forget everything, and not be able to focus.  Seeing as I'm dealing with some of my own issues I can understand a little bit of what she's going through.  Next time I HAVE to remember to remind her BEFORE we go out the door.

Just yesterday I was writing about how good the month of July was and that things seem to be turning a corner.  What I didn't write about is this heart thing that has come back.  Well, it never really left, but it was MUCH better than last year a this time when I was waking up in the middle of the night with my heart racing.  Now it's racing, but not as fast, but it's during the day.  Last week on Monday I felt bad for hours.  I got home and I took the pill they gave me and I felt better.  During the rest of the week I felt pretty good, but I did have moments where I checked my watch and the beat count was over 100 beats per minute when I was just sitting down doing nothing.  Not good.  I need to go see the doctor about this, because I was doing so well until just a couple of weeks ago.  Later this week, maybe tomorrow if I can find the time, I'm going to go on my health care app and get a consultation.  At the very least they can give me a refill of my prescription.  The pills they gave me really do work well, but I don't want to have to take any pills.  I want to go back to the way I was before.  Other people in my life have had to deal with chronic illness, but I was the lucky one that didn't have to.  Until now.  I don't like it.  It's bad enough that I feel horrible about dying some day, now I have this shit that makes me wonder.

Monday, August, 2, My aunt called her lawyer about her paperwork last week and all we got was a muzac.  The call would say something about them having new offices in Reseda.  Then music would play.  Then the call would hang up.  My aunt thought she was doing something wrong, so she had me call.  It happened to me the same way.  Two times in a row.  That's when I told her that we should just go to the lawyer's this morning.  So we did.  I told my aunt to tell him, "I know it's not your fault that this is delayed," in order to make the guy feel better.  She thought that perhaps his son was handling the matter, but I told her that without any evidence of that we couldn't say.  Still, she didn't want to be accusing him of anything.  She followed my lead and the lawyer said that the office where the paperwork is to be submitted is going to open on Wednesday.  He said to check back with him on Thursday.  OK, some progress.  Just as we were leaving the phone in his office did ring, so I don't know what is the deal with our phone calls being dropped.

When I arrived at work this morning our new "friend" was sitting outside with all his stuff in tow.  I thought he had been banned, but I guess he was going to test that ban today.  He tested it on Saturday and was arrested.  He wasn't going to test too hard, because he never entered the library courtyard.  He stayed outside in the walkway talking on the phone to someone.  I was told that he was talking to someone at "City Hall," but I'm not sure who or what they could be talking about.  At around 10:30am we noticed that there was a car in front of where he was standing and he was loading his stuff into the car.  At first we thought it was his car, but then we realized that he had called an Uber.  He packed that thing and was on his way.  He may be crazy, but he's also not dumb enough to want to get arrested again.

I got an email saying that Disneyland had an announcement tomorrow for "Legacy passholders."  The news won't be told until tomorrow, but the rumblings online is that they are going to announce the new annual passes.  I hope they're not so expensive.  I suspect they will be though.  Damn.  I guess we'll know more tomorrow.

Tuesday, August, 3, Disneyland finally announced the new annual passport program.  The top tier pass is going to cost a pretty penny.. $1,399 to be exact.  That's a LOT of money.  I'm not sure I want to spend that kind of money.  But, the only days I can go would be on the weekend.  Which means I'm stuck.  Well, I'm stuck if I want to go to the park like in the past.  ARGH!

I talked to Emma about the price and told her how I needed a "side hustle" in order to be able to afford the passes.  She offered to help.  That's nice of her.

Wednesday, August, 4, My aunt gets really eager in the morning with serving me my breakfast tacos.  I've mentioned it here before, but this time she REALLY jumped the gun.  Yesterday I didn't have my shoes on when she served up the tacos.  That was bad, because I rushed to put my shoes on.  Today she didn't even wait until I got out of the shower to serve me the tacos.  She gave me some cockamamie excuse about how they were going to burn if she left them in the oven a little longer.  No thought to MAYBE turning the head down, I guess.  I don't understand why she rushes this taco thing.

I told TheGirl that we should go to the Smokehouse in Burbank for dinner tonight.  It's my week to pay, and I have some bucks in my pocket.  TheGirl and I ran into a former TV weatherman from NBC, Fritz Coleman.  I started watching him back when I was a kid.  It was nice to run into him.  I didn't say anything to him.  I just enjoyed having seen him.

I ordered up a Manhattan and the tri tip.  It was really yummy.  I finished most of it, but have juuuuust enough for a small sandwich.  TheGirl ordered fish and chips, which is a personal favorite.  I almost ordered that, but I wanted some meat tonight.  All in all a great night.  The weather was super nice, and so was the booze and the company.

A photographer came around the tables and asked if he could take our picture.  I actually liked the pictures that he took of us, so I bought them for $30.  I know, it's WAY too much.  $20 and I think this guy's sales go up through the roof.  But, I also don't know his overhead on the whole deal.

Thursday, August, 5, I went to the 99 cent store after work today, due to the fact that my aunt wanted some stuff.  While there I noticed they seasonal aisle was packed with Halloween stuff.  I guess it's never too early.  I figure that most people want to celebrate since they didn't get to celebrate last year.

My key fob has been broken for a while now.  Earlier this week I ordered a replacement.  It arrived today and I decided it was no time like the present to replace the fob.  I was surprised how tough the old fob was, seeing as it was broken.  It would have taken quite a bit of movement to break it, it turns out.  Oh well, I like my new fob.  It's nice and solid.

Friday, August, 6, There was a moment today when TheLooker found me and asked me to help her with the projector in the so-called "Reflect Space."  I happily went to help her.  There was a moment where TheLooker was telling me how she's, "So done with this place," where she was standing next to me and I sat down on the couch that's in the room.  Her hips were right in front of me, and I could just reach out and bring her close to me.  I so wanted to do that.  At that moment TheLooker sat down next to me.  Right close to me.  I so wanted to lean in and kiss her, mask and all.  I'm not sure she didn't want that as well.  We sat there for a moment in silence, until this patron came into the room and disrupted the moment.  That was it.  That was my chance.

These are Jade's bins.  Soon they will be gone.  I kinda want to claim them.  Actually, now that I think about it, the best thing that can happen is we can release so many of the bins that are all around circulation that he put things in when the transition from renovation time to opening time.  I'm going to drop that knowledge to my co-workers when Jade leaves for the branches.  All I know is that soon these stupid bins will be gone.

FireGirl is still on the window at the fire station on Tuesdays.  That's fine.  But every other time I've gone there on a Thursday and Friday the new lady is nowhere in sight.  I get that she must have things to do that I don't know about, but FireGirl never was too far from the window.  I'm sure she was doing the same things that FireGirl was doing before.  I know FireGirl was telling me that the new girl was single, but how can I ever make a move if she's never around?  Yeah, I think this isn't going to work.

This is a picture from San Marino's social media feed.  They must have had TheNewCute pose for a so-called "book face."  So nice.

I was asked by the Brand dopes to pick up some signs from public works at the city lot off of Chevy.  When I arrived there was a ton of stuff (look above).  This kind of delivery needs a special delivery.  I threw in as much as I could from the stuff and went to Brand.  They were surprised by the stuff I took them, and then I told them, "yeah, this is not even half of it."  They said it would be better to get the rest next week, on a special delivery.  So come Tuesday I'll make a trip down there before the route to do this special delivery.  It's such a huge amount of stuff.  I love how these dopes never get some sort of idea about what they're ordering for delivery.  They say, "Oh it's not that much," and then it turns out to be a mountain of stuff.  Fuck that.

Saturday, August, 7, I forgot to mention the other day that Emma said that we should celebrate our birthdays together.  Her birthday is September 9th, the same day as TheGirl, strangely enough.  That falls on a Thursday this year.  My birthday falls on a Friday, and I already have plans with TheGirl for that day.  Emma asked if I was free on the 11th.  I told her I was.  Which means I'm likely to be doing something on the 11th with Emma.  Nice.

Sunday, August, 8, My photo feed brought up a picture of Talia from 2005.  She was quite attractive back then.  Not only that, she was willing to get naked and sleep with me.  No girl at that time was looking to do that.  Hell, you don't see them jumping into my boat now.  I keep saying that we're supposed to hang out, but I'm wondering if it's ever really going to happen.  Talia still hasn't fully recovered from the shingles.  And then part of me thinks, or knows, that it's just going to be a fucking mess.  Sigh.

My aunt kept pestering me about what I wanted to eat today.  When I woke up she immediately started asking me what I wanted for breakfast.  I wasn't that hungry, and what I wanted to do first was to trim my hair and then shower.  After I got out of the shower she continued to ask what I wanted for breakfast.  "I don't know," I told her.  She asked me three more times before she asked if I wanted something from McDonald's.  She didn't wait for my answer, and instead just said, "When you go get me an apple pie."  OK, so I threw a couple of hot dogs into the toast oven and went to McDonald's to get some hash browns and an apple pie.  I wasn't really THAT hungry, but my aunt kept on insisting.  Later in the day she kept asking me what I wanted for lunch.  "I don't know," I told her probably five times.  I finally just went to Jack in the box for something.  It wasn't that bad, but it wasn't that good.  She wanted me to order some onion rings for her.  She ate like three of them and said the was full.  Then left them for me.  Onion rings are good when they are hot, but they aren't good reheated.  At least not most of the time. Then later in the day she pulled out a frozen package of raviolis and cooked them up.  I didn't want them.  But of course she never listens to anything I say, unless it serves her needs.  So now I'm stuck eating raviolis for lunch tomorrow and Tuesday.  ARGH!

Monday, August, 9, I jerked off last night, but I didn't stay up too late.  I was in bed before 11:30pm.  I should have been in bed at 10am, but today I get a later start in the day, so it's not as important to be awake super early as the days I go to Glendale.  Even still, when I got up at 5:30am I was like "ARGH, must I go to work?"  Mondays are really the worst, and it's strange because at work Mondays are the most chill.  I'm on the reference desk for two hours.  Yes, JUST TWO HOURS, and here I am bellyaching about having to go into work.  For the moment I'm coming in and chillin the rest of the time I'm here.  I don't have any current projects, so I've been cruising.  And here I am in the morning not wanting to get out of bed.  Shame.

A co-worker at Glendale said that she knew a girl that also had a stuffed animal.  She thought it would be a good idea to contact her.  I think she's trying to set me up.  This weekend I figured I would bite the bullet and send her a text via social media.  That was Saturday.  Here it is Monday and I haven't heard a thing from her.  I guess that's my answer.  Oh well.

The last time I used the treadmill I bought was back in the second week of June.  That means it's been two months since I went on the treadmill.  That's WAY too long, but I felt that I should really get on that horse again.  Tonight I did ten minutes, which wore me out big time.  I really need to do this every day.

Tuesday, August, 10, My aunt was telling me this weekend about a cooling hat that cools really well when wet.  In the back of my mind I thought, "Wouldn't any hat that I got wet cool my head?"  But, I still went online and tried to find it.  With the limited information I had I was able to find it, and I bought it.  It arrived yesterday.  Today was the first day I got to try it and I have to say that when I first put it on it was really cool to the touch.  As the water evaporated it was less cool, but if it helps I'm willing to try it.  On these hot days a cooling hat is better than nothing.

This morning I set out to finish delivering the signs that I couldn't deliver last week to the Brand library.  Thankfully Tony went up to Brand to help me unload this bullshit.  When I got to the city yard there were no delineators to be seen with the rest of the signs.  There were some a few feet from me in the storage area.  I figured it best just take what I could from that pile and if they needed more later I could come back and get some.  I didn't want to come back to the yard if it's not absolutely necessary.  I don't know what means these dopes are going to use to move all this stuff when they have their concert series, but that's not my problem.

Last week one of the security guards was attacked by this moron at the library.  The dummy wasn't wearing his mark, so the guard went up to remind him to do so.  And, the guy also came to the attention of the guard due to him pounding the table.  The guard went up to him and as he said, "Could you please put your mask on your face," the dummy jumped up from where he was standing and took two shots at the guard.  Not OK.  The guard says he was more stunned than anything.  But, the guy did manage to graze him with one of the swings.  One of my coworkers ran up and told the perp, "If you want to fight, fight me."  That's when the perp ran away.  The security camera got a few shots of him.  Not super clear, but enough to make an identification later.

Cut to yesterday and Vagabundo is asking me for the guard's cell number.  I sent it to him and Vagabundo sent me a picture of the guy he thinks hit the guard.  He was at Casa.  The guard never responded, so Vagabundo asked me to double check with him today.  I did my special delivery and when I got back I made a beeline to the guard to ask him to confirm the number.  When I got there Vagabundo texted me to say that the guy had returned and was there at the library..  Time was of the essence.  I knew the following events had to go quick and in order for things to work out.

I became the intermediary for messages from Vagabundo and the guard about the guy.  The guard and I did a side by side comparison of the picture Vagabundo had sent me and the ones taken by the security cameras..  As we enlarged the area of his face the guard became more convinced that this was the guy.  We then sprung into more action.  The guard and I went to administration to tell the assistant director about all this and get the police going to the branch. Within twenty minutes the whole thing was resolved.  The guy was caught, and was singing like a canary.  Vagabundo told me that he heard him confess to being at Central the other day, but of course didn't know anything about the assault.  Either way, the police served him with the paperwork that tells him he's banned from the library for a period of one year.  Good riddance.  And it was the part timers that got this done.  TheLooker turned out to be the first to spot him.  Vagabundo took his picture.  I facilitated getting the guard to look at the picture again and confirm it was the guy.  The new assistant director called the police without hesitation.  We all did our parts, and did them well.  A pat on the back to all of us.

Wednesday, August, 11, Well, come October or perhaps November I'll have a new supervisor.  I was told today that Becks is quitting and moving to the Monterey peninsula.  Her husband got a job up near Salinas.  I'm not sure what Becks will be doing up there, but for sure she's moving.  I've had like three supervisors in the last six years.  T said that this particular position is "cursed," because now everyone is around for two years or less and then leaves.  Oh well.

Meanwhile I got to meet three new workers today.  Two clerks were given a tour of the library, and earlier in the morning I got to met the new analyst.  Three in, one out.

TheGirl and I went to the Counter for dinner tonight.  She's been worried about her notary paperwork, so we both needed some good food and wine.

When I got home tonight the inside of the house was like a sauna.  There were two fans on, but the back door wasn't open to let in the cool air.  I think I've said it before, but I don't think my aunt knows how a fan works.  After arriving home and finding my aunt asleep in her bed I figured that best change the flat tire and put the donut on the car to save time for tomorrow.  Just before I was about to finish up I noticed my aunt was in the living room with a bulb on an extension cord.  I yelled at her from my car, "I'm done."  She slinked away.  I didn't see her after that, because she went to bed.

Thursday, August, 12, I thought I had gotten my stuff ready last night, but when I got out of the shower and started to put my work clothes on I noticed that I didn't have any underwear or my under shirt.  I'm such a dope.  I guess I forgot to get my stuff ready because of all the flat tire stuff.  I felt like such a dope.

After finally getting everyone ready for work I got out the door and went to the tire shop.  I arrived about ten minutes before 8am and waited.  In less than twenty minutes I was out the door with two new front tires.  It sucks that I have to get new tires so soon after getting new ones.  But, it had to be done.  When I got out of the parking lot I sent a text to TheGirl saying that since I had new tires that it was time to burn some fresh rubber.  Woo hoo!

When I was out on the route I got up to Montrose and they had quite a few books for me to return to Central.  As you can see from the image above you can see that they left a note that says, "No room at Mont," meaning Montrose.  This is yet another of a long list of examples of how floating doesn't work.  But, is anyone going to fix this?  Nope.  Veed was there one day when I was telling Emma how floating is a huge failure.  He is someone that can directly talk to DrDeath and Syco about this.  I know he won't say anything though.  Like everyone else, he knows not to bring these subjects up.

I got a flyer in the mail advertising the return of Enchanted: Forest of Light at Descanso Gardens.  Last year it was obviously cancelled due to Covid.  This year it will hopefully not be cancelled by the Delta variant.  The only thing is, TheGirl was wondering if she could go since so many venues are not having patrons that visit show proof of being vaccinated.  I don't know about that.  Perhaps I should plan on taking someone else that night as a back up.  Just in case TheGirl isn't allowed to go.  She did say that she would get vaccinated once the vaccines were "fully approved."  But, I don't know about that.  I guess as with everything, time will tell.

Friday, August, 13, While I was sitting outside in my backyard last night there was a helicopter hovering the entire time I was outside.  It was still hovering after I went inside.  When I got inside I saw on the news that there had been a deadly crash.  A driver was going southbound on the northbound 101.  I haven't heard any follow up of the story, but I wonder if the guy driving was drunk.

There are so many "donated" books at the branches.  Brand alone had about twenty-five boxes waiting in the back dock area for my coworker and me to take to Central.  I really hate that they can't just throw their discards in their trash cans.  It's because the dummy bosses don't want to deal with the possible drama of patrons complaining about the library throwing books away.  I really wish I could just burn them.  Alas, I have to take these damn books to Central.  It's one of my least favorite things to do.

I really wish I had the guts to make a pass on TheLooker.  I know she isn't interested in me, but I would really like that to be a different story.  Today she wore a silly little dress, for lack of a better word for it.  Then she sat down in front of me as she checked in some books.  The dress revealed her thigh, which looks really nice.  She's pretty.

Emma invited me for drinks about two weeks ago, but I couldn't do it then.  I wasn't in the mood.  But, I couldn't dodge her forever.  I felt bad as well, since she sincerely wants to hang out and here I am dodging her.  I'm terrible.  Drinks were good though.  And Emma is good company.

After drinks Emma wanted to walk down the street to check out this new bookstore.  The bookstore was pretty cool.

Saturday, August, 14, I was moments away from going to McDonald's to pick up some breakfast for my aunt when the doorbell rang.  I told my aunt to ignore it.  But, then the person knocked on the window.  I told her I would check it out.  It turned out to be a friend from the past coming to visit me.  We had a falling out during the 2016 election when she said something mean about my aunt.  After that I didn't want to deal with her bullshit any more.  We had a pleasant talk.  She didn't stick around too long because she was going to drive up to Oxnard to visit her grandmother.  She told me her grandfather passed away a couple of years ago.  I don't know if this will be the beginning of anything moving forward.  I honestly don't miss the friendship with her.  She said she's so bored living in Vegas.  Oh well.  She has two kids now.  When the falling out happened she was pregnant with her first.  I sent her a text saying it was good to see her.  If she responds we'll see where that goes.

TheGirl's friend gave her a parking pass that allows her to go in to CityWalk and/or Universal Studios for free.  Not the park, but the parking lot for free.  She told TheGirl to invite me to lunch and she did.  Today was the day we went up to Johnny Rockets at CityWalk for some lunch.  They have booze there, so lunch really hit the spot since I got to day drink.  The food at Johnny Rockets is pretty much as I remember it... passable.  The little sliders I had were tasty.  The chili cheese fries were good, I only wish they smothered the fries in more chili.  Oh and the booze was good, if not a tad on the weak side.  Still, it was nice to get out and just not be home for a few hours.

TheGirl is heading up to Solvang tomorrow to hang out with her brother.  He's going through some rough times.  He used to work for Disney, and they might hire him again.  However, here was a guy I thought had it all due to the fact that he made good money at Disney.  But now he's struggling financially.  He really needs a job to pay off his bills.  I guess he did have a lot of money coming in, but like in so many cases you have more you spend more.  Ain't that the truth.  So TheGirl is going up there for the day and coming back Monday in the morning.  She grew up going to Lake Cachuma in the Santa Ynez valley.  We went up there once when we were dating to do some camping.

I keep seeing a raccoon, or one of several raccoons, in my backyard lately.  Here is one that I saw just a little bit after I went outside.  It was super hot today, so I didn't get to go outside for much of the day.  And there it was, this raccoon.  I heard the snaps of an animal climbing down the pine that's in my backyard.  Sure enough, I stood up and looked at the movement and right there, staring back at me, was a raccoon.

Isla and I were texting tonight when in one text she asked me if I had checked Disneyland for reservations for our trip there.  I had such a busy week that I totally forgot to check.  I went online immediately and found that Blue Bayou was not available.  Dammit!  That was the first choice for us.  Second choice was Lamplight in DCA, but that was also booked.  I finally found that Cafe Orleans had reservations for 12:40pm, so I took it.  I guess we'll figure out what to eat for dinner when we're there, because I couldn't find any other open spots for dinner.  Drat!

Sunday, August, 15, Ilsa and I were speculating about the circumstances behind the wrong way crash from earlier this week.  I told her that I figured the guy was drunk and he went into the wrong offramp.  It turns out the real story is much more lurid.  Here is the short article as it appeared online.

Family of mother killed in wrong-way Encino crash speaks out

The family of a young mother is distraught after she was killed in a wrong-way crash in Encino on Thursday.

Juan Zavala, the brother of the 26 year old Aimee Garcia, a mother of four, said he was on the phone with her when he heard Garcia and her husband arguing.

"I told them, 'You're going to make it home. You'll be fine. Just stay safe. Little did I know that they [were going to] get into that accident," Zavala said.

Zavala said Garcia had ben a victim of domestic violence before the crash.

"Unfortunately, my sister sacrificed herself for her kids. It just hurts that the kids are going to grow up without a mother," Zavala said.

The driver, identified by the CHP as 31-year-old Cesar Iban Torres of Los Angeles, has been charged with murder and with assaulting the police officers who responded to the scene.

The news said that the couple was having an argument, as it says above, but that the idiot guy got mad and went on the offramp on purpose.  He wasn't drunk, he was just crazy angry.  I'm not sure about the "sacrificing herself for her kids" line in the article.  Not sure how she did that, and why she would since the car was going the wrong way on the freeway, and it seemed like the guy was trying to hit a car head on.  The semi was reported to have tried to get out of the way, but it was too late.  The car hit on the passenger side, of course, and she died and the rest in the car were OK.  Now the children will be orphans, since their mother is dead and their father is likely to be in jail for the rest of his life.  Life lessons here.

The weather liar said that it was going to be 101 degrees today.  Thankfully it didn't get THAT hot, but it was pretty damn hot... and humid.  That's what makes it worse, the damn humidity.  I pretty much slept for hours today.  I had the A/C going and that barely kept the heat at bay.

I jerked off last night.  I know, big deal.  I waited till my aunt went to sleep and started stroking it.  About half an hour into the deed I was ready to blow.  But I didn't want to cum so quickly.  I told myself that I wouldn't cum until I jerked off for at least an hour.  I found some more videos as my dick pulsated.  Several times I was so close to cuming, but I held it back.  I found out last year that this move is called edging.  They even have some videos that are have a metronome in the corner that speeds up and slows down to challenge the viewer to not cum.  Those videos are crazy.

At about the hour mark I continued.  Long ago I remember reading somewhere that women didn't like "minute men."  Meaning that women didn't want some guy that fucked for a couple of minutes and then came.  When I was in my early twenties I read that and I told myself that I would "train" myself to not cum so quickly.  I would jerk off and count every stroke.  I would get upwards of two thousand strokes.  The good thing was that it taught me control.  When I was with Talia she would cum and she would say, "Aren't you going to cum?"  Of course, I would tell her.  Same with TheGirl.  She wondered if everything was OK.  I would tell her, "I know I'm going to get mine... I just want to make sure you get yours."  I know, what a gentleman.  Ha!

Monday, August, 16, I had a year and a half long vacation from my cousin's kids.  But, today was their first day back in school and of course they show up in mass at my door at 7am.  I mean come on, give a guy a break.  School doesn't start until 8am, why the FUCK are they always showing up at 7am?  It's useless.  They don't do anything but sit around the living room until it's nearly 8am.  ARGH!  I really wish people would be reasonable, but they're not.  About the only positive thing I can think of pertaining to my cousin's kids coming back to the house is that at least my aunt will have company.  She may dislike it, but I think the company and the stimulation is going to be good for her in the long run.

TheNewCute is out of town visiting her family.  I texted her today and she returned the following text: "We're supposed to be celebrating my birthday today and I'm eating McDonald's crying. My family is so manipulative.  I can't wait to go home."  Damn.

TheGirl went to Solvang this weekend and after coming back she told me that because of Cheyenne getting old and unable to handle trips she thinks that we should cut our trip from four days to three days.  Sigh.  I love Cheyenne, but I feel that TheGirl might be using her as an excuse for many things, including cutting our trip short.  I guess it's OK, since it will save me money from staying another night.  Still, I didn't want to come home so quickly, and now under her plan I'll be home on Saturday, not Sunday.  Maybe I should find a way of staying another night, maybe in Santa Barbara.  Or I could save that money and use it toward a trip that I could take alone later in the year, or perhaps in January.

Tuesday, August, 17, During the middle of the pandemic I didn't often go to the mail room with my hand truck.  But, now that things are slowly opening up, and there is more and larger items coming through the graphics department, I now feel that I have to take the hand truck with me every time.  Like in the old days.  Yeah, I had a nice nearly two year vacation from doing some things on the route.  However, the time has come to realize that from this point forward things are just going to continue to get "normal."

Well, I broke the side mirror on the van again.  AGAIN!  I feel so stupid.  I told Mala about it via email.  I told her I would fill out the accident form.  I'm not sure what is happening, or why this has happened again for the second time in three weeks.

As I was leaving the garage at work I turned right just as the car besides me started to make a left turn.  There is no left turn there, because what's there if you turn left on Westbound Harvard street is the fucking library.  Well, this idiot made a left turn onto the sidewalk in front of the library.  Then she got stuck there.  I saw her struggle as I drove up the street.  Part of me wanted to double back and record the bullshit this idiot was doing.  But, I didn't want to stick around that shit.  I really want to reduce my intake of stupidity from this city and this world.  I was able to get the picture above.  Granted, it's really blurry and doesn't show much.  But, it kinda does how that this idiot is on the sidewalk.  Bullshit!

Wednesday, August, 18, I woke up a little earlier today due to my cousin's kids throwing my schedule off.  I went out to the back door to open it up, to let in some fresh air.  When, to my surprise, I could smell the scent of rain.  It wasn't actually raining, but it was drizzling.  OMG, what a wonderful feeling to have after suffering through so many days of heat and humidity.  When I came out a little later to put seed in the birdfeeders I found the sight you see in the picture above.  A nice coat of moisture on the ground.  How absolutely lovely.  I want to hope that there is a day ahead where the rain comes back to us here in California.  But honestly, the way things are going I'm not holding my breath.

I got to meet one of the new pages today.  She seems nice.  I asked her some questions and she mentioned that she is an English major.  Nice.  Not going to lie, she has a nice figure as well.

The other day I noticed that T looked a little bigger in the belly area when she was walking into the library.  One of my coworkers asked me if I knew if she was pregnant.  I told them that I wasn't sure, but then Pseudo supervisor confirmed it today, T is pregnant.  T suffered a miscarriage about four to six months ago, I don't exactly remember.  This is why she hasn't made a big deal about telling anyone yet.  Perhaps she will tell us all soon.

I'm going to tell TheGirl tonight at dinner that she should cancel one of the days of our trip.  She has concerns that the extra day up there would be too much a strain on Cheyenne.  That may be true, and I don't want anything to happen to Cheyenne.  I can always just go up there by myself some time in the future.  Emma says we should go up together, but she wants to bring along her new fella.  Which is understandable.  However, I'm not going to be a third wheel in that party.  Although, nothing says I have to spend too much time with Emma and her fella.  Though, I wonder what the guy will think of me tagging along.  I know if I was him I would be thinking that Emma and I were sleeping together in the past.  And may want to continue to sleep together in the future.  I think it's a perfectly natural thought, even if Emma told him there was nothing there between us.  Again, if I were him, I would still find that very suspicious.

From this point forward I'm not going to suggest anything for this trip.  TheGirl wants to go up to the Fess Parker winery, which should cover the second day of our trip.  All the other stuff I researched I'll save for another day.  If I ever get this photo blog thing going I should make Solvang one of the photo missions.

I'm turning fifty years old in about a month's time.  FIFTY.  If I don't get smashed by some idiot driver, or a tree falls on me, or any number of terrible accidents that could happen to me then I should be able to live how many more years?  Realistically?  Fifty more?  Fourty?  It's more likely that I would have thirty years, tops.  It could be as little as twenty years.  Twenty years.  That's not a lot of time.  Those twenty years are going to go fast, for sure.  If that's all the time I have left then what I am going to do with that time?  How can I maximize that time?  How can I use that time to confront the fact that it will all end.  It's a horrible thought that you turned a corner, and that the corner was actually long ago.  Then I think about how if I have twenty years left I can't be woking until the day I die.  I need to pay off my bills sooner than later so I can enjoy what might be the last decade to possibly three decades of my life.  Because it will all go so fast.

I know I keep bringing this up, but with that health thing last year and Covid still running rampant, these thoughts come to me.  I think it's natural to think about your own end.  But I need to focus on what I have and not what will happen in an unseen future.

TheGirl and I went to this place that used to be called Riverside and is now called Michael's at Riverside.  There was a whole dispute between the two owners last year.  I guess one of them must have bought the other one out, because now it's just owned by one guy.  TheGirl and I have been there many times.  Tonight I started talking to a couple that was moving to Wisconsin the next day.  We started talking to them because they were looking at Cheyenne.  Cheyenne makes friends wherever she goes.  She's adorable and people want to come up and pet her.

Thursday, August, 19, Emma told me today via text that her lunch period was moved from 12:30pm to 1:30pm.  This means we won't be having lunch any time soon.  She said that it was moved because Veed is so busy having meetings.  Oh yes, the stupid meetings that never get anything done.  Oh well, nothing lasts forever.

I had that itch that I get when I feel I should check my email from work.  In my San Marino work email I found the above email.  It would seem that there is now a restraining order on the jerk that has been hanging out by the library.  I have to say, this guy has an amazing talent.  He showed up about a month ago and in that short amount of time he was banned from the library and now he has a restraining order.  I hope this keeps this guy away.  I also hope that this makes him move on to the next city.

I got the news today that Jade got his way again.  All you have to do, if you're Jade, is to just ask.  I was told that he didn't want to work on Saturdays, which is a requirement for his new position at two of the branches.  But, because he probably bitched about it, he doesn't have to work on Saturdays.  Now instead he's going to work at Central every other Friday.  Not sure what he's going to be doing at Central now.  Everyone found out about this change in schedule, and they were not liking it.  It's because it's bullshit.  All the other full timers have to work on weekends, why not Jade?

My cousin's kids didn't come in the morning nor in the afternoon.  Perhaps they took the hint.  I sure hope so.  I really, really, hope so.

Friday, August, 20, I said in my last entry that perhaps my family got the hint.  Yeah, they didn't.  They just took a day off.  Fuck this shit!  I really hate this shit.  I can't even stand the smell my family leaves in the house.  It goes right into the back of my nose and lingers there.  I'm going to have to get a candle.

This morning I was really pissed off when I went to brush my teeth and someone was in the bathroom.  Why don't they take a shit at home?!  Why do they come here to shit?  I had to leave this morning without brushing my teeth.  I was nearly at the freeway when I noticed on the security cameras that they left and I doubled back and brushed my teeth.  ARGH!  This is what I get for thinking that they weren't going to show up this morning and me slacking off a bit.  No more.

The dopes at Glendale sent an email survey about new t-shirts that we're supposed to get.  Someone took the survey and all it was a survey of sizes.  Not what should the new look be, or do you like this color over this other color.  Nothing like that.  Nothing significant.  Just, what's your size.  I can tell you right now the next t-shirts are going to be shit.  I think I need to find out if there's a way to get custom shirts made with my own logo.  I don't want to wear these stupid shirts anymore.

I went to Pasadena to exchange books with them.  They had three bins of our books and we had three bins of their books.  When I got there I saw the new bungalows in the parking lot that will be serving as the Central book processing center.  The Pasadena driver will be working out of these bungalows.  Dorian said that he's probably going to be sending the Glendale books though the system that sends books from one library to another.  Glendale/Pasadena never used it in the past, because we were doing it through delivery.  But now we don't deliver to each other on a regular basis.  We'll see how this works out.  Dorian also said that he will not be sticking around long enough to see the reopening of Pasadena Central.  The library is closed, and will likely be closed for five years or more, due to the necessary seismic retrofitting that now has to be done to the building.  The building opened in 1924, and no one noticed until recently that there it was not seismically safe.  Now the city has to invest millions of dollars to retrofit the library.  It will take years.  I guess Dorian is already thinking about his retirement.

Saturday, August, 21, I downloaded my tickets for the Hollywood Bowl show in two weeks.  TheGirl and I are going to see John Williams.  We've done that before, but it must have been like three or four years ago.  I think it's closer to four years.  The last time I went to the Bowl was WAY back in 2016.  That's too long.  The funny thing is this year I plan on going two times.I

I was watching some reruns of Three's Company the other night when I noticed something.  The actor that portrayed Janet Wood, Joyce Dewitt was always a favorite of mine.  I know that Susanne got the press, because she was a pretty blonde, but I always liked Joyce's figure more.  On the episode entitled "Jack's Graduation" the Janet character was dressed in a little black dress.  I always liked her figure, and when they would have her in jeans it would drive me nuts.  I don't know how I missed this episode though, because of this random moment that I saw on this last viewing.  In the first picture above Janet is greeting the dean of the school.  Her dress is see through!  You can see she's not wearing a bra!  A few minutes later the ladies hug Jack and boom... Joyce's butt can be seen.  And she's wearing a thong!  It's hard to see on the screen cap, but when you watch the episode it's pretty clear.

Monday, August, 23, I don't have much to report about today.  I went to work and worked.  Nothing special today.  TheNewCute did come back from her "vacation."  She said she didn't have a good time back home.  She argued with her family the entire time.  That is so not a vacation. 

I told myself that I would go back to the old route, pre-Covid, this week.  I think it's time to just go back to the way I used to do the route.  I'll try it tomorrow.  I'm not setting anything in stone, that's for sure.

Tuesday, August, 24, First off, let me say that the reason why yesterday and today's entries are going to be so short is because this week has been pretty boring... so far.  Today I only have route talk, and it's boring.

Tony and I were tasked with making some special deliveries today.  We had to take some tables and chairs from Central to Adams.  And then when there take the big TV and bring it back from Adams to Central.  Then after that we were to take about ten book trucks to Adams from Pacific.

Coming up on Thursday we're to take some stupid book shelf up to Chevy.  Oh, and get this, the tables we took there last week... they want us to bring one back.  They said having two didn't work.  Fucking idiots.  Since it's not their backs that are breaking when they move this stuff they can afford to be cavalier about moving furniture here and there.  Idiots.

Wednesday, August, 25, When I drive to San Marino on Wednesdays this trash truck blocks my way.  It's AWAYS there.  It's so frustrating.  The last few months I've seen the guy that drives the truck, and for some reason he can't pull over.  Whatever, I guess some thing will never change.

As a goof I went on the Disneyland site to see if I could get a new annual pass, renamed the Magic Key.  As you can see above, the website was busy.  The wait was supposed to be about one hour from this point in the queue.  But really, I'm not going to buy this just now.  Maybe later this month, for sure before October.  This is nuts.

I thought with Jade not being at Central his reign of terror was over.  That was wishful thinking.  Today Jade sent me the above text telling me nothing I wouldn't find out by myself.  ARGH!  I didn't respond to his text.  Fuck that shit.

I told Talia that I would go over this Saturday.  I figured that I best go over and visit her already.  She and I have been texting for weeks about hanging out.  If I don't do it now I won't be able to do it for a few weeks.  Next weekend I'm going to the Hollywood Bowl and the weekend after that I may have some plans.  For sure the 18th I'll have plans.

As we were texting the conversation went to a job that she was offered at a school cafeteria.  A friend of hers was saying that it might not be a good idea to get the job.  I told her that friend is nuts, because it's a great idea to get this job.  As we continued I mentioned that she will be as tired as I am every day after work (see above).  Then Talia went for it and dropped all pretenses by saying, "We should just make love."  I'm OK with that.  I hope she's true to her word, because in the past she has said we're going to do it only to leave me with nothing.  I guess we'll see.

TheGirl and I went to Paty's for dinner tonight.  We hadn't been there in a long time.  My meal was fine, but I don't think I'm going to suggest going there for a long time. It was more about the service tonight.  It was a little slow, but I can't say that the food wasn't yummy.

TheGirl and I are going to the Hollywood Bowl next weekend, so we talked about our plans.  We want to get some food and have some wine.  That reminds me, I have to get some wine.

Thursday, August, 26, I was at Montrose and Emma was having lunch.  We were talking about the new Disneyland annual passes going on sale yesterday.  I told her how I went online yesterday and the wait was multiple hours.  She mentioned that someone she knew also waited for hours to get their Magic Key.  As a goof I told her, "I'm sure if I tried right now it wouldn't be much more than a ten minute wait."  So I went online and sure enough I was on in less than a minute.  I almost thought of buying my new annual pass at that moment, but I best wait.  I want to wait to around the time of my birthday.

Friday, August, 27, This has been a boring week.  Work was nothing special.  I feel bad even writing this sentence because IT'S boring as well.  Perhaps tomorrow will be interesting.

Speaking of tomorrow, this might be a stupid move, but I'm not jerking-off tonight.  I want to save myself up for Talia.  I want to believe that we're going to have a good time.  If that doesn't happen then I'll just jerk-off Saturday night.  Now that's a plan.  It's hard to know if Talia really just wants to "make love," or is just saying that.  Time will tell.

And speaking of getting ready, I have all the stuff I think I need for tomorrow.  I charged my little 360 video camera.  I also charged my Polaroid, and ordered more film.  The film won't arrive in time for me to take it with me, but I plan on shooting at least one cartridge of film, which is eight photos.  I'm going to take two films, one color and one black and white.  I bought a mask for Talia MANY months ago.  I think it nearly a year ago, because it was a Halloween mask sold in September.  Wow, it took this long to go see Talia.  I also have my portable light, so I can bring some light onto the subject, for the pictures.  And not lastly, but lately on this list... condoms.  I bought some a few weeks ago, as I noted in this journal, just for this day.  And hopefully for the upcoming days with Talia.  If this works out I should really plan a little getaway with her to somewhere like Malibu or Long Beach.  Somewhere close by, where we could just fuck and have some dinner out on the town and fuck again, before having to go back home.  A weekend staycation, so to speak.

OK, I'm getting WAY ahead of myself here.

Saturday, August, 28, I never learn.  I should have known that nothing would change when it comes to visiting Talia.  Going over to Talia's is always a mistake, but horny me thought that perhaps THIS TIME things would be different.  Yeah, well no.  It was a replay of the last few times I've gone there.  As soon as I entered the place it was already a horrible idea (see above).  Talia's hoarding has only gotten worse.

When I arrived I saw that Talia was filthy.  Her feet were so dirty that I could see the dirt between her toes.  Yuck.  I told her if we were to do anything she needed to shower.  She said she didn't know the last time she showered.  Oh I'm sure she doesn't.  She showered and then got into the lace body suit I got her for her birthday.  She actually looked pretty nice in it, but not great.  Who am I go critic her body though, my body is a perfect mess.

Still, we got to taking some pictures, like the one above.  I took a bunch of pictures that were OK.  I tried my best to get some good pictures, but it was a bit of an uphill battle.

I took out my Polaroid camera and I think most of those pictures actually came out pretty good.  Check out the one above.

I should have known today was going to go this way, since it has gone this way ever other time I've gone for a visit.  I never learn.  I really need to stop thinking going over to visit Talia is going to ever going to lead to happiness.  And I also have to face it that I'm not going to be with anyone else.  I should use this as a learning moment, but knowing me there will be a day in the future where I will get super horny again and will think that I can find some sort of happiness with Talia.  Well, I can't.  I'm better off just being alone.  That is a fact that has become apparent over the last few years.  Oh well, I guess knowing is half the battle.

A couple of weeks ago I bought some so-called disposable cameras that I bought from Lomography dot-com.  And I also bought some more Polaroid film, since I used one cartridge on Talia yesterday.  I can't wait to try out the new cameras.

Sunday, August, 29, You know what I hate the most?  Ignorance and stupidity.  My aunt displays both.  I forgot to mention that yesterday she closed the front gate after I left to visit Talia.  I told her I wasn't going to be long, but sure enough, just over an hour and a half after I left she went outside, in the heat, to close the gate.  I told her I would be back in time for us to have supper.  ARGH, it's like she doesn't listen.  Of course when I got home I wasn't surprised, since I had already seen her on the security camera closing the gate.  There was zero reason for her to close the gate.

I don't know why I check my work email on the weekends, but I do sometimes.  I say that I get an itch, and sure enough I got an itch today and boom, there it was, an email from work that was just too good to pass up (shown above).  They keep asking me to participate in things, but honestly I don't like to participate in anything these days.  Work is work.  No need to get too involved with work.  I do the minimum, under protest.  Ha ha!

My buddy texted me last week to ask if I was busy today so that we could get some Numero Uno pizza.  I told my aunt that he was coming, but I didn't know what time.  He originally said after 5pm.  But, then he sent me a text saying his stomach was upset, and that he had to raincheck today's hang.  OK, that's cool.  It was too hot today anyway.  He asked me if I was busy this coming Saturday, and I had to tell him that I was going to the Hollywood Bowl.  So our little birthday hang will have to wait.

I was such a lazy bone today.  It didn't help that it was really warm today.  But still, I'm always super lazy on Sundays.  I retired to my room after having breakfast.  I lay on my bed watching YouTube and of course I passed out.  I slept on and off for the next three hours.

Is it sad that I'm looking forward to next Monday... not for anything but that it will be a day off.

Monday, August, 30, I go to the Vons by work to get most of my groceries.  I don't like buying things that need to be refrigerated there, because I tend to forget them in the fridge at work.  But other stuff I can get there no problem.  There's a really pretty girl that works there, and I bump into her from time to time.  Last week she was in the health aisle, and I walked by her.  Today I went the entire shopping trip and didn't see her.  I went to the self-checkout today, because the regular line was packed and I didn't have any booze with me.  When I finished I turned to my right to exit the market and boom, there she was in front of me.  I haven't even seen her without her mask, but she looks so nice.  Alas, I can't even begin to talk to her.  And what do I have to offer her?  She also probably has a fella.  So yeah, three strikes.

I wanted to go by Total Wine tonight after work in order to buy some wine for TheGirl and I to enjoy while at the Bowl this weekend.  I figured I could go to Carl's Jr. on the way there and get the Santa Fe chicken, which is the only good thing left on the menu.  The burgers are pretty terrible.  Well, as I pulled up the lady at the order box tells me, "We don't have any chicken."  Damn, I thought to myself, that's what I wanted.  OK, I figured I would get a burger.  There was a new burger that was introduced recently that is made on sour dough bread.  I figured OK, I'll try that.  Well, I should have done what the car before me did... leave.  The burger was pretty terrible, and it assures me that I'm never going to go back to Carl's Jr. again.  The quality of their food has been pretty horrible for years, and expensive to boot.  Bad combination for me.  I didn't realize it, but my stupid little burger cost me $7.16.  For what I got, in size and quality, that's highway robbery.  I could have gone to Taco Bell and ate better for $5 than this slop.  Never again.

Tuesday, August, 31, Some things happened today, but really I'm really for it to just be September already.

Here's the bullet points, because I need to get my lunch ready for tomorrow.

Tony and I made a special trip to Pacific in order to pick up those stupid boxes that Krishna wanted out of her branch.  Done.

TheLooker wants me to post a video this week.  She is pushing me, rightfully, to get this photo vlog going.  She thinks I have a future online.

It's the end of the month and I'm looking forward to doing all the stuff that I have lined up for September.  Like going to the Hollywood Bowl.  Hope it goes well, and that TheGirl and I have safe fun.

That is all.  I'm tired.