Last month was a pretty good month.  Good enough that I gave it a B- grade.  This month isn't going to live up to that, I'm sorry to say.

Tue May 1, The library at Glendale has been open for about a year now after the renovation.  In that year so many things have gone wrong.  One of the biggest things is from nearly day once of reopening the carpet has been coming up.  Here is it, nearly the anniversary and the carpet situation still hasn't been fixed (as shown above).  I guess it's too much to ask for some glue that doesn't come up immediately.

I have a coworker that I think is pretty cute.  She certainly has a nice figure, and she seems genuine.  Not sure how I could befriend her, but I think she's a project now.

Today I went out to Alhambra to pick up some things for Brand that will be part of an art installation at the gallery.  I went out first thing in the morning, and made the journey back to Brand.  There were two of these frame things that looked like tables.  But, both wouldn't fit in the van.  Therefore I was only able to take one of the frames to Brand.  I'll had to go back on Thursday and get the other one.  This special delivery pushed my regular delivery back to nearly noon.  While I was at Brand I took their donations and threw them in the recycling bins at Central... where they belong.  I wanted to get this done today so that the dopes at Brand won't be nagging me over and over again.  Now they can just shut up about these stupid donations.

The rest of the route was pretty standard.  When I was at Casa I tossed some of the stupid fliers for the so-called "maker fest."  Which is a fucking waste of time.  And I knew that my buddy would appreciate me tossing them into the trash.

Wed May 2, I have a bit of a crush on LaFlor.  That's pretty obvious since I've mentioned that I like her, and I have featured some pictures of her here on this journal.  But I do want to get to know her better.  Deep down inside I don't think I could be in a relationship with anyone, because I'm essentially still in a relationship with TheGirl.  It's a friendship/relationship.  But, I also want to sleep with someone and have that good time as well.  Because I don't have intentions on sleeping with TheGirl again.  I guess I could sleep with her, but I made the decision not to a long time ago since sex got in the way of our feelings.  Not to get all crazy, but not having sex with TheGirl was the best thing that happened to our relationship.  But I still want to have relations.  I want to get to know LaFlor for this reason.  But it's also unfair, like it was unfair last year with TheWish, to only want to have sexual relations with LaFlor and nothing else.  I guess I just want it all.  I want to be able to still have my visits with TheGirl and have a relationship with LaFlor or whoever.  This is why I'm single.

TheGirl and I went to an Italian place that she spotted when she was walking Cheyenne.  Well, this place has been pretty meh the other times I've been there and tonight's food was no different.  They don't make my drinks right, basically making them weak-sauce.  And then the actual food is pretty flavorless.  After watching a certain TV show where the master chef goes to a restaurant and critiques it, I wonder if the food is just frozen and reheated.  And this place seems to have that "reheated" sensibility.  Oh well, at least the company is good.

For some reason I checked my work email when I arrived home from dinner.  I found an email from Maleficent saying that she was going to retire in June (shown above).  Her email rang hollow and of dead.  Her legacy will be punctuated by the failures of the last decade, especially the last five years that included the renovation.  The renovation was/is a total failure.  After being open only a year the library is already falling apart.  Yes, it won some award for the renovation.  But I dare ask those who gave the building the award to walk around the building now and see how it's already falling apart.  Whatever, Maleficent is leaving and no one I talked to today seemed to care.  It was basically "good riddance to bad rubbish."  And I think that everyone figured she was going to leave soon anyway.  And perhaps she stayed a little longer than most people figured, including me.  I thought she would leave right after the reopening.  Now this opens the door for AD to take over completely.  She's horrible, but I will give her a chance to fuck up.

Thu May 3, On Tuesday I had to go to Alhambra to pick up some things for Brand.  I could only fit one of these "tables," for lack of a better word.  This meant that I had to go today to pick up the other one.  It was cool.  I took less time today since there was no preamble.  I just went over there and picked up the thing and delivered it to Brand.  Also, I didn't have the added task of taking donations from Brand, like I did on Tuesday.  Whew!

The route was pretty standard today.  Except for the extra trip to Alhambra, everything else fell into place as it usually does.

Last night my aunt was asking me what I wanted to eat.  I never know, because nothing ever tastes that good to me these days.  I'm pretty sick of all the bland food I eat.  So last night I decided to just pack some rice for lunch today.  My aunt made rice, and that's what I packed for my lunch today.  Yes, just rice.  It hit the spot, in the sense that it filled up my belly.  It certainly wasn't all that great, but whatever.  At this point I should just eat rice for every meal.  I really wish I didn't have to eat at all.

There's a coworker I think is pretty that works at Central and Grandview.  She was wearing a grey top today that really showed off her body.  The security guard and I were talking about how I should ask her out.  She seems nice and is a hard worker.  I think she's pretty.

At the end of my work day AD sent out an email announcing the new manager at Pacific (pictured above).  I'll obviously reserve judgement until I see how she is at the job.  But I have to wonder something my buddy mentioned to me.  How come in all of California there's no one qualified for this job that they had to go all the way to Louisiana to hire this woman?  Might be a bad sign.

Fri May 4, This is a picture of some boxes filled with books that I took over to city hall today.  It's the same old thing every day... boxes of books.  Before leaving on the route I talked to Benedict.  He told me that he had an interview with the water department on Tuesday.  Which should have made me ask if he was going to the all Nazi day, aka staff development day.  I guess I'll see him on Tuesday, or not.  It is funny that he tells me that he hates coming to the library.  Well dude, there's the door.  He added that he was first on the list for the test they took for the job.  But everyone says that.  Whatever.

My lunch today consisted of some meatballs and a hot dog bun to make a sort of a meatball sandwich.  The only thing I needed to complete my lunch was something like a potato or macaroni salad.  I was running a little late this morning, so I didn't get a chance to go to the market.  I figured I would have a chance later.  Well, because I had some extra things this morning I didn't have time to go right to the market.  Also, I forgot to head to the market until I was already on my way to Chevy, where I was going to have my lunch.  I figured I could find a market on the way up to the branch, and sure enough there were a few places I went to today trying to find a potato or macaroni salad.  Well, I should have known that Armenians don't like potato or macaroni salads, because I couldn't find anything at the three places I went.  The first was a market, that seemed like it would have one or both of the salads.  But, it didn't.  I went to a small neighborhood market, where the guy behind the counter was bent on telling me about the sandwich special.  I asked him if he had potato or macaroni salad and he just said, "You can have a sandwich and it comes with a soda and chips."  Ah, I don't want that.  I left, went across the street to another place that said it was a "delicatessen."  WRONG.  It was just a liquor store with some pre-made sandwiches.  Not a deli at all.  After that I just went and had my lunch.  I need to be more prepared when it comes to my lunch.  I don't want to be going from place to place for something that should be pretty common in delis and markets.

The library has hired a lot of new people, at Central and at the branches.  Here is a bad picture of another one.  I was introduced to her a couple of weeks ago, but I haven't seen much of her since.  I didn't notice last time that she has a really nice figure.  I don't know anything else about her other than she looked really nice today.

At the end of the route I was sitting in Keyvon's office when TheDesire walked in to the office.  We were talking the shit about various things.  TheDesire mentioned that she had an interview with Santa Clarita.  And then mentioned that she is torn, because getting the job would mean she would have to choose whether to go or stay at Glendale.  For my sake I would like it if she stayed, but of course that means nothing.

Sat May 5, About a year ago I booked my room for Carmel at the place I had stayed three years in a row.  I had a conversation with one of my coworkers about them heading up to Carmel with his family.  It reminded me that around this time last year was when The Fireplace Inn emailed me to ask if I wanted to book a room for Thanksgiving.  I did and I did book the room.  Today I checked the availability and found that they were no rooms available for Thanksgiving.  Hmm, I thought, that's strange.  I went to another website that agitates room availability and sure enough nothing was available.  I did find a place that was priced right and so I went ahead and booked the room.  I can always cancel this room if something else comes up.  I just wanted to have my place set just in case.

Sun May 6, My coworker showed me a picture of a note that was in the suggestion box.  As you can see I'm named as being polite and professional.  Yup... that's me.  It was nice to be named at all.  My coworker pointed out that I was the only guy named.  But, then I'm the only guy.  Ha!  It's funny, because I really am the only guy in this group.  Hmmm.s

Mon May 7, I was already at work when my buddy asked me to call him as soon as possible.  I was in a place at the library where I could call him, so I did.  He tells me that they called him in to drive today, since dummy Benedict didn't show AGAIN.  I think I mentioned it here that Benedict is going out for a job with the city.  I sure hope he fucks it up somehow.  The best is if he gets the job, quits the library job, and then gets fired for his stupidity at the city job.  What a damn turd.

When my buddy arrived at Central he saw that there was flooding in the public bathrooms.  Not just one, but BOTH men's and women's.  I just LOVE that the pipes at the library are continually getting clogged.

My buddy drove and still went to his regular shift at Casa.  I told him he needs to stop covering for dummy.  He agrees, but doesn't know how to get these dopes to understand.  It's going to be hard since he is reliable.  But they shouldn't rely on him.  What they need is to get rid of Benedict, and hire someone more like my buddy.  It's never going to happen though.

I went over to visit TheGirl after work.  I told her I had to head home earlier tonight since I had to wake up super early tomorrow.  It was cool.  I played a little with Cheyenne, who had some flea meds on her back, so we couldn't fully roughhouse like other nights.  When I got home I had a couple of night caps, since I wanted to just fall to sleep like a rock.

Tue May 8, When I first arrived at the library today there were already people in the building setting up the food for "breakfast."  We were promised "breakfast" today.  I joked earlier in the week that we would be served powdered eggs.  What was there was not really what I would call a breakfast.  I suppose you could call it a continental breakfast.  I was busy taking pictures to get any food.  I did look over the food and nothing appealed to me, so I went about taking everyone's picture.

While everyone ate the so-called breakfast I was taking "class pictures" of everyone.  The first person is the girl I've posted some pictures of from Grandview.  I do have a bit of a crush on her, as I've said here before.  The second is known by many names, but my buddy Dane calls her big eyes.  She's gorgeous.  My buddy Vagabundo has a HUGE crush on LP.  She's incredible.  Next is Gen page, who is a small marvel.  Ru follows.  Her body is so abundant.  Last, but not least, is TheDesire.

I honestly can't tell you what today's stupid talk was about.  AD seemed to be head of the class, because towards the end of the day, when we were all weary, she was chiming in with all the right answers.  Fucking idiot.  I can't tell you what was said today, because there was a point in which my active listening shut off.  When I detected bullshit, my mind turned off.  Something about feeling empathy for the patrons or something like that.  It was when she said that the techniques she was talking about may or may not work that I just shut down.  Why are these so-called techniques being talked about if they don't work?  Of course later I realized that one of the women was the same dope that came to the library several years ago and showed us the one desk system developed in San Jose.  These dopes never implemented that system the correct way, but fundamentally it is a flawed system that is doomed to failure.  And I see why now.  Because it throws away real world learning with this pie in the sky way of seeing everything.  One is based in reality, the other is based on bullshit.  Is it any wonder I learned nothing today.

At the end of today's torture we still had to suffer the indignity of doing a group picture.  My buddy and I pieced together a story about the group photo that I want to share here.  Apparently AD was wondering what was taking so long.  I'm not sure why her panties were in a bunch, because this group photo was HER idea.  But, apparently I wasn't moving fast enough for her.  At one point Maleficent even suggested that we go and pose in the front steps of the library.  AD gave her a look and Maleficent just retreated.

The public bathrooms were STILL flooded at the end of the day.  I took the above picture just before going home for the day.  The fucking thing wasn't ready for business despite the fact that the plumbers were here ALL DAY working on the pipes.  All DAY!

Wed May 9, I was busy at work today.  Pseudo supervisor was not feeling well, so she left early.  But I had a bunch of other work to do today.  Mainly for the big tea service on Saturday, to celebrate the pending royal wedding.  The librarians asked me to print out picture of the clock tower in London.

There is a girl that I've talked about here on that I find attractive.  But I've hardly had any interaction with her, even though she's been going to the library for the last few weeks.  Today I FINALLY got some interaction with her.  She and her friend came up to the reference desk to ask for a study room.  Her friend (pictured right) was chatty and was making jokes.  But the one I like didn't say much.  Damn!

TheGirl and I went to a restaurant that she mentioned she didn't like too much because the food was meh.  But, tonight she mentioned that the salmon there was good.

I didn't know what to eat once I got there so I ordered a pizza.  It wasn't very good.  When I got home the stupid pizza had fallen out of the box onto the floor of my car.  Ruined.  Fucking pissed me off, but at the same time the pizza wasn't very good.  TheGirl and I talked about trivial things tonight.  I mentioned to here that we need to go on another trip.  She agreed. 

Fri May 11, Since Pasadena didn't deliver any bins yesterday today's route bins were minimal.  I had one bin for half of the branches.  The other half of the branches had two bins each.  That's it.  That's nothing.  And yet today was a long day.  I wanted to show that circulation was still a clusterfuck of books (shown above).  What a fucking mess.

Two of the ladies at Casa were checking out the photos from the all stupid day on Tuesday.  Gen page actually liked her portrait.  Gen is stunning.  It's hit and miss with people liking their portraits.  I think most people came out looking good.

The shut-in that I have been visiting for the last few years has now moved to a new place in Sun Valley.  It's a haul to go out there, and I have to find a way to not go so far, or go less often.  I drove by a former coworker's new job.  I'll text her tomorrow and tell her I was in neck of the woods.

I rushed to return to Central after going to Adams.  When I arrived at Adams it was 4:45pm.  That meant I didn't have much more than an hour to finish not only the delivery but also the special delivery of Krishna's stuff to Grandview.  Krishna told me that her first day at Grandview is Monday.  She also told me that she wasn't going to show the new person the ropes.  One of the librarians at Pacific was saying that Krishna's move was, "Disgusting."  He didn't elaborate, but I did ask him to explain that.  He didn't, but I know he knows something.  In time I may find out what this librarian was referencing.  I somehow did make it back to Central at 6pm.  It was a full day driving all around town.

Sat May 12, I woke up to a rainy Saturday.  I don't remember the news saying anything about rain today.  But, I honestly don't remember watching the news last night.

Before going to work I had a bunch of errands I needed to run.  One of the errands was to fill my gasoline tank.  When I was getting out of my car a dope drove up and got out of his truck.  He never turned off his engine.

I took a picture of the sign I printed and posted on the side door of the library after watching this dopey couple walk back and forth for at least ten minutes, and then later complain once they found the entrance to the library.  Apparently some other dope also saw the sign the other day, and my buddy Vagabundo told me that this dopey patron complained that the "joke" wasn't funny.  Yeah, well, don't be a dope.

I was super busy at the reference desk today.  So much so that I felt that it was some sort of a test to see if I could keep my head above water.  Of course I my best to keep all the balls in the air.  Did I succeed?  At this point I'm just happy that I didn't drop the balls more than once.  And all this because there was a tea party in the community room.

As my shift ended this whole tea party thing started.  THIS... is what all the fuss was about these last two weeks.  Ever since these dopes heard that the BBC would show up to film their little shindig they have gone to the extreme to make sure it looks good on TV.  They had me find some photos of previous royal weddings, as well as print out a poster size photo of the clock tower these dopes incorrectly refer to as "Big Ben."  Because, if they knew better they would know that Big Ben is the name of the fucking bell inside the clock tower, not the clock tower itself.  Whatever.  I didn't have time to print out the clock tower picture, but they had one of our coworkers print it out.  Of course I searched for it and resized it so that it would be ready to print.  I didn't have time to do it when I was here on Wednesday, but that's because I was on the reference desk while I was trying to print that and the Union Jack flags they wanted for this tea thing.  I didn't have any interest in sticking around for this thing.  Mainly, because I have worked for nearly a month straight.  I'm tired.

Sun May 13, Today was Mother's day, and the IHOP that my aunt and I go to nearly every Sunday was packed.  This is the first time in a long time that we actually had to wait for a table.  Not only that, but after we ordered it took about half an hour to get our food.  It was not fun.  It's the worst service we have experienced at this IHOP.

The library was the complete opposite of yesterday's hectic nature.  Today was chill.  Thankfully.  I'm so very tired.  The last time I had a day off was the day I called out sick.  But I can't really count that since I didn't really get a day of rest, since I was nursing a cold.  If you want the last day I had an actual day off then you'd have to go back to April 21st.  As of today I've worked for twenty-one straight days.  And at the end of this work marathon I will have worked twenty-seven straight days without a day off.

Mon May 14, I woke up a few minutes after 4am this morning and I groaned.  How could I be awake so early?  Could I return to sleep, since my wake-up time was another hour and a half?  Thankfully I did go back to sleep and thankfully I didn't sleep through my alarm.

The reason I woke up super early this morning was because T asked me to go with her to the elementary school for the summer reading presentation.  A couple of weeks ago she asked if I would go with her since two of her library assistants, who would normally go with her, were going to be out of town.  I agreed to go with her, but I REALLY had no idea what she wanted me to do.  At one point she said that she just needed to have someone for moral support.  That I can do... I think.  Then she said that I could do the "jokes" during the presentation.  I was happy with whatever she wanted to assign me.  Hey, I have no dog in this fight, and these days I just go with the flow.

We arrived at the school and set up.  Pretty soon a bunch of kids were filing into the auditorium.  The first group were the youngest kids, first and second graders.  They were easy to please.  The next group were the third and forth graders.  Still easy to please.  The last group were the fifth and sixth graders, and they were not as easy to please.  I half wanted to tell them, "Hey, at least you got out of class for a half an hour."  But, I didn't.  By the time the third group came I was weary.  I didn't eat anything this morning for breakfast, because I felt nauseous.  Because of that I was now feeling weak and weary.  But then I told T, "Look, we can do this.  This is the last one."  And sure enough, before I knew it it was over.  We survived.

We finally got back to the library around 11am, and that's when I FINALLY was able to get some food in my belly.  After picking up my aunt last night after work we went and got submarine sandwiches.  I only ate one half of my sandwich, even though there was a point in the night that I thought I would finish the whole thing.  But, it wasn't meant to be.  Because I needed something to eat this morning.

The reason why I didn't get to go home at my regular time tonight was because Pseudo supervisor wanted me to take a picture of the foundation members.  Well, of course they were going to do it after their meeting, which stated at 7pm.  The reason why we were taking the picture was my own fault.  I need to shut my mouth and not give myself more work.  Whatever, the photo was done and done.  Even though I'm not happy with the results, it's done.

I left for work at 6:48am this morning and as you can see from the above photo I arrived home at 9:03pm.  How many hours is that?  About fourteen hours, correct?  Despite the long day I was surprisingly not that tired tonight.  I figured that I would be super tired tomorrow, since things like this usually take a day or two to really hit.  Wait, that means that I'll be tired on Wednesday for sure.

I wanted something good and filling for dinner.  As I got on the freeway I was thinking of several places I could go to pick up a burger.  I decided upon Fatburger.  It's not as good as it used to be, but it's still pretty good.  And I knew that this burger would really hit the spot tonight.  Sure enough, I ordered a half pound burger, which is bigger than I'm used to ordering these days.  The burger fucking hit the spot.  I asked them to charbroil the burger, and that made the meat nice and yummy.  After such a long day a big burger and fries honestly hit the spot better than anything else could.

Tue May 15, I went up the stairs to go up and validate my ticket in administration when I noticed that the stupid slaughter desk was empty.  No one was staffing it.  Just amazing.  Thankfully there were hardly any patrons coming into the library.  Most of the patrons coming in were going to stake out their spot in the study area, or on the computers.

Upon checking for interdepartmental mail upstairs in administration I saw a whiteboard with various shapes and some writing.  Apparently the whiteboard showed all the upcoming events.  What a bunch of shit.

Keyvon asked me via email to have the van washed.  Supposedly someone complained that the van was dirty.  My buddy seemed to think it might have been Benedict that said it, but I told him that Benedict doesn't talk to Keyvon.  Who knows, but I'll find out eventually who said this shit.  This is the first time any boss has ever "ordered" me to get the van washed.  I wanted to ask Keyvon today who mentioned it, but no such luck.  He wasn't in the office the entire day.

Speaking of Benedict, someone told me that he has to pass the final interview in order to possibly get the job at water and power.  We shall see what happens.

When I arrived at Grandview I saw that Krishna's car was already there.  She was sitting on the first desk by the door.  She was on the phone, and playing around on a laptop computer.  When she turned around she looked tired.  After she got up she looked to me like a fighter that had gone at least ten rounds.  She looked weary, even as she said that this was a great opportunity.  She later asked Les about his schedule, and she wondered how she could cover the gaps in the schedule for later in the week.  She asked Les if he could still come in and do his regular shift until she was settled in.  He said he would.  The both of them mentioned how neither of them were given any direction in this matter.  You could tell Krishna was frustrated.  I can't say she looked like she was about to cry, but she looked down for sure.

There is a new branch manager at Pacific Park, and today I met her.  She started yesterday.  I basically was introduced to her and that was pretty much it.  Not much of a chance to get an impression of her.  She is smaller than I thought she would be.  Aside from that I can't know anything.  Could she be OK?  Not likely, but of course I'll give her a chance to prove herself.

Wed May 16, There was a program today where some nurses came into the library to test people's blood.  They've done this every month.  Every time they do this they block the fire exit by the community room.  I've told them in the past that this isn't allowed, but the still do it.  Today I just walked away from this shit.  I just don't give a shit any more.  I used to care, but I don't have the energy to fight these stupid little battles.  I rather save that energy for other battles.  Other more important battles.

I was busy today with pseudo supervisor work.  But at the end it wasn't enough.  I worked late, about a half an hour past when I usually leave work.  Pseudo supervisor wanted to finish the newsletter today in order to send it to the printer on Friday.  I'm so done with everything that I didn't even remember that we had this deadline.  I honestly don't care.  I'm simply going through the motions these days.

I didn't visit TheGirl this Monday, because I had the longest day going to school with my coworker to promote the upcoming summer reading program in the morning and taking a useless picture of the Foundation members in the evening.  That meant no visit with Cheyenne either.  She pounced on me as soon as she saw me tonight.  The above photo is of her over my shoulder moments before she started licking my face.  TheGirl said it... she missed me.  I missed them both.

Dinner with TheGirl was much needed tonight.  It's been a long week, and there's still days to go.  I've worked for nearly a month straight, and I'm really starting to feel it.  I just want to rest.  Dinner and booze REALLY hit the spot tonight.  I didn't even get to tell TheGirl the story of Monday's antics.  It was just nice to no think of work tonight.  Fuck work.  These days my jobs really stink.  There's nothing in the work that excites me.  I love the people I work with, because they are full of beans and that makes for a good story.  But the conditions of both jobs is bad.  Both are rudderless ships that are headed straight to the rocks.  But no one says anything.  They just mention how everything is fine.  We'll, everything isn't fine.  Everything isn't going right.  Everything sucks.

Thu May 17, Today I had a regular Thursday delivery route.  When I arrived at Montrose Syco asked me if it was OK for us to use the red bins, which are used to send new books only, for delivery.  I told her no, those are not to be used for delivery.  She then told me that Benedict was telling her employees that it was OK to use those for delivery.  I repeated that they were not for that, and she said that she would tell her employees to, "Ignore what he says."  Nice!  Love when I can undermine his stupidity.

This is why the above photo of some bins is apropos, because I left these bins for Benedict on Tuesday.  I knew he wouldn't do it, but the idea was to see if he would not give anyone any extra bins.  I always try to give Montrose extra bins, since they always need extras.  But of course dummy doesn't ever distribute any bins to those who need them.  He does the EXACT OPPOSITE and leaves every branch short.  Him telling that the branches can use the red bins is doubly horrible.  He is the worst.

When I looked at my options for lunch today I just put my hands up and gave up.  I knew that I would be getting a burger for lunch today.  Sure enough, I did.  My aunt has made a lot of food this week, but I just couldn't eat another meatball today.  Nor could I have some lentil soup, since I knew I would eat it in the morning for breakfast.  No way I could eat it twice today.  My aunt always asks me what I want her to make for food.  I never know, and I mean I really don't know what to eat.  Food isn't that pleasant these days.

Fri May 18, I walked by Cerberus this morning and had to take a picture of the empty bins.  I like how these administration dopes try to polish the turd that is this useless sorting machine.  It doesn't sort a fucking thing!  It's useless.  But I've said that before.  I just want to keep posting photos of it here to show the continual bullshit.

When I showed up to circulation I noticed that I didn't have too many bins going out on the route.  It would seem that no one did the sorting last night.  The bins were still sitting by the table, where I left them the day before (as shown above).  If this means more bins for dummy Benedict on Monday then I'm good with that.  Fuck it.

One of the things I did have on the route today were a couple of 3D printers and some cut printers, for lack of a better word for them.  They were all going to Montrose.  And let me add that they are a total waste of money.  I've said it before, this commitment to this so-called "maker space" idea is wrong.  It's throwing money out the window.  Sewing, 3D printing, VR, are all such niche things that thinking they can get more than a few people to show up is nothing short of delusionary.  But, these dummies just keep raising the ante on this concept of the "maker space."  They keep buying more and more 3D printers.  OK, I don't want to go into a whole tangent about this.  I wanted to just point out that they're spending more money on this while neglecting the fact that the fucking bathrooms don't work.  Speaking of the bathrooms, this morning I walked into the men's room and it smelled as bad as a downtown alley.  It smelled like a million people pissed in there and no one had ever cleaned it.  ARGH!

As I was getting the van loaded one of my coworkers from the children's room comes up and says, "Can you take these books to blah blah blah at Grandview?"  I told her that to my understanding blah blah blah wasn't going to be working at Grandview any longer.  My coworker said, "Oh, let me find out," and then left me with the bin of books.  She later called to say not to bother taking them to Grandview.  I knew it, of course.  Blah blah blah and Krishna don't get along, and blah blah blah told me that she wasn't ever going to work at Grandview as long as Krishna was there.  She was supposed to work today, as a matter of fact, but called out "sick."  Yeah, way "sick."

Mala emailed me about making a special delivery today.  I talked to the guy that's in charge of the "defecate space."  He was the one that wanted me to pick up something, but in talking to him on the phone it became more apparent that the things he wanted me to pick up would be too big for the van to carry.  I told him I could pick up some of it, and he at first said that would be good.  But then he said, "But if I have to get someone else to pick them up then they can just pick everything up."  Amen.  It took a while, nearly until 3pm, for Mala to FINALLY get back to me and tell me that I didn't have to pick the things up after all.  Which is fine by me.  They need to have someone with a bigger vehicle pick these things up.

The shut-in I visit has moved out to Sun Valley.  Instead of being in a rest home she's living in an actual home (pictured above).  I have NO idea how she ended up living here, but I have hidden the fact from anyone at the library.  This is because the head reference librarian mentioned to me that if she moved out to Sun Valley that she might not "allow" me to go out there and drop off books.  Thankfully Judy told me today that she would like it if I visited every two weeks.  Lately I've been visiting her every week.  It's turning into a whole thing.

After traveling out to Sun Valley I made a mad dash to finish up my last three stops as quick as possible.  I had already spent too much time going out to Sun Valley.  My last stop before going back to Central and unloading the van was Adams.  I dropped off three computers and got out of Dodge.  There... done and done.

Sat May 19, After working for nearly a month straight I FINALLY got a day off.  Which makes me wonder what I have to do to assure that I can have more than one day off a week.  I somehow have to have more days off.  I know I need the money, and having that extra money due to the added hours is great.  However, I don't want to have to work six days a week any more.

I woke up early today, but went right back to sleep.  I then woke up at around 10am, but didn't get out of bed until 11am.  By then of course I was hungry.  My aunt heard me and asked what I wanted for breakfast.  I had already gone to the bathroom and afterward looked in the fridge to see what was available to eat.  Nothing really appealed to me.  I had that burger on Monday and that hit the spot, but I can't say that it was ultra good.  Most things I eat these days are just OK.  I feel bad for my aunt, because I know she's getting frustrated with me.  She always asks me what I want to eat, and I never know what to say to her.  I almost want to say that she should just make some white rice and leave it at that.  I'll just live on rice alone.  Fuck everything else.

Mon May 21, I'm not even sure how to write about this, so bear with me.  I had a scheduled meeting with TheLamp and the head librarian this afternoon.  It was agreed to last week, and we were going to discuss an upcoming library project.  But before that started the head librarian asked me, "Are you OK?"  I didn't know what she meant by that, so I asked her to clarify.  She proceeded to tell me that I had missed some assignments and that she wondered if I was bored, or was something going on in my life.  The only thing I felt was my face going flush.  I later told someone that you could say that I felt like a fighter that had been hit with a punch he didn't see coming, and it stunned me.  I continued to describe the feeling of now answering this "charge" of slacking off as a fighter that is stunned, but still has the wherewithal to keep his gloves up and put up some sort of defense.  I countered with explanations for the two assignments I didn't complete.  Of course they shook their heads and said that everything was fine.  No.  Everything isn't fine.  As I thought about it more and more I really felt like the whole thing was an ambush.  I never saw the punch coming, and it staggered me.

As time passed I was stewing.  I couldn't think of anything but this "meeting."  I was heartbroken.  I have always given my all at that job.  I loved that job.  It was only a few months ago that TheLamp was evaluating me and saying that I have "never refused an assignment."  Yeah, that's not in my nature to refuse to do something.  But, apparently I'm a horrible person.

I was talking to someone about this and she mentioned a coworker of ours that doesn't ever do anything, and when she does she often makes mistakes that others have to clean up.  She literally doesn't get in trouble because she's the circulation manager's pet.  And yet, here I am like a sucker being "talked" to about not finishing up my assignments when I go ABOVE and WAY beyond what I'm supposed to do there.  THAT is what is now pissing me off about all this.  I didn't deserve this.  Well, it's time to figure out an exit strategy.  I know the library is a sinking ship, and it's probably a good idea to escape before the whole thing goes under.  Man... what a lousy day.

Last night I had this thought that things need to change.  I'm not happy with these two jobs.  Not because of the work, but because of the lousy leadership at both rudderless ships.  If the boss sensed anything it is my growing frustration with everything wrong at the library.  I wasn't going to voice it, but it does need to be said at some point.  In my drunken stupor last night I had a moment of clarity.  Many things have to change for the better in these lousy times.  I thought about how I need to really focus on that which is important.  Not these horrible jobs.  No more extra time given to these jobs.  No more going above and beyond.  From now on, no starting early.  As a coworker that's in Brazil right now told me today... there are people in that building that don't do their job, or do it badly.  No one says one thing to them.  Well, things are definitely going to change there.

I went to visit TheGirl, as is the Monday tradition, with no intent on telling her what happened to me today.  I'm still trying to process what happened in that stupid meeting, and I didn't want this special time to be interfered with by the actions of idiots today.  I know now that from this point forward nothing can ever be the same as it was in before today at San Marino.

Tue May 22, Nothing really happened at work today.  I did my job, is all.  I know that my work ethic has been impugned lately, but I still just go along and do my job.  I didn't really chit chat with anyone today.  I just put my head down and did my job.  Nothing special

My buddy O came by for a visit tonight.  I talked to him about what happened yesterday at San Marino, and he gave me a new perspective on this whole.  He told me that they probably saw that my productivity is down from my usual high standards.  In other words, they expect me to always go above and beyond that it's become the normal.  If I slow down a bit they think that I'm slacking off.  Despite the fact that I'm still doing a lot of work.  Whatever!  I'm done.  Tomorrow I have a plan to go into the office and take all the personal items I have there and take them home with me.  I already remotely deleted some files on my cloud, and I'm going to delete everything else that's mine from that computer and find a way to delete that stuff.  I felt worse about yesterday's "meeting" today than I did immediately after it happened.  The more I think about it, the more I feel insulted.

Wed May 23, I had a plan to take all my personal items home with me today.  The picture above is of the grocery bags, two of them in total, that I filled with my stuff that was formally in my office.  I have to remember that this place isn't a second home.  I arrived early, having set aside a few grocery bags in my car for this "operation."  The traffic was pretty light this morning, so I arrived relatively early.  I also didn't stop at the market or get gasoline, like I often do on a Wednesday.  No, just went straight to work and upon arriving straight to the task.  As I said before, I took the grocery bags and filled them with my personal items.  I don't have much, because a few years ago something similar to this happened and I cleaned out my personal shit.  Still, I had enough stuff and clothes to fill two grocery bags.  After taking all my stuff and putting it in my car I went back to the office and started wiping all the personal data off the computer.  I have zero intentions of ever leaving that computer with personal items.  If I could I would have wiped the memory.  As it was, most of my stuff was already off the computer, because it was on a cloud server.  I deleted the files remotely last night.  But then I still had another cloud account that I had to reauthorize.  I felt a little cleaner after having cleared out the data on that computer.  I have to continually remember not to go above and beyond at this place ever again.

I didn't tell pseudo supervisor about the little talk I had with the boss on Monday.  She left not feeling well on Monday, but there was no way I was going to bring it up to her today.  No way.  I'm not even sure if she's the one that said something to the boss that had the boss initiate the little talk.  So, I went to work on a poster for an upcoming project.  Pseudo supervisor wanted it today.  And I did my best to get it done today.  And there it is, all printed up and ready to hang.  It's not my best work, but I think it went well.  Fucking week.

I had an interesting interaction with TheWish today.  Close to my shift being over I went to the circulation desk for some reason or another.  I don't remember now.  Perhaps it was to get away from the reference desk.  The point is I was chatting up TheWish when at one point she was behind me and she up and puts her head on my shoulder.  Oh I know what that means.  You don't have to tell me twice.  It was a nice moment, and part of me would have liked to have just turned around and ask her to dinner again... or just kiss her.  She was looking super cute today as well.  ARGH!  Why didn't it work between us?  Oh yeah, because I'm a dope.

TheGirl and I were having dinner and she was telling me about her drama with her daughter.  I then decided to tell her about my little meeting.  I tried to frame it like the whole thing was presented to me.  She was blindsided like I was.  She agreed that I was blindsided, and that it was unfair for them to do what they did to me.  This I know.  I won't bore you with all the details, but suffice to say she was surprised that I hid this from her on Monday.  I told her I didn't want to think about that while visiting her and Cheyenne.  Because to me that's more important than the bullshit I had to deal with at work.  My bosses want to think that I'm not pulling my weight, despite the fact that I've pulled more than my weight for nearly a decade, well that's on them.  I've done more to change that library for the better than a lot of those dopes.  I see now that those in charge are not going to remember all those years of loyalty and service.  Because, why would they?  It means nothing to them.  Well, now anything beyond my scheduled time there means nothing as well.

Thu May 24, I was heading upstairs when I saw this complete and total mess at the newly installed fifteen minute computers.  The wiring on these things looks like a child of five did it.  It's a fucking mess.  Not sure why these wires have to be exposed.  Not sure what the designer of the computer platform was thinking as well.  It's a hot mess, and I voiced it to anyone that was standing next to me.  But, no one really cares.  They install it fast and dirty.  They don't care what it looks like.  I'll tell you that this thing looks like a fire hazard to me.

Here is another picture of the "super" busy Cerberus book sorting machine.  Because of course it works.  A little after I took this picture one of the librarians informed us in circulation that the budget for DVDs had been "slashed."  He went on to point out that the DVD collection is one of the most highly circulating collections.  Circulating more than any other collection, by a lot.  But no, the wise dopes in administration would rather not spend money on actual circulating material.  They would rather spend it on stupid sorting machines that don't do anything.  Or 3D printers no one will ever use.  Because that's the way of the library these days.  It's a fucking shame.

I packed the van today, and I do mean packed.  Just look at the above photo.  It's not piled three high, but I used up pretty much every inch of space.  The reason was boxes to Casa and Grandview.  So many extra boxes.  Oh well, I didn't worry about it.  I knew everything would get to where it's supposed to go.

I was driving down the driveway at Brand when I saw a truck fly through the intersection and a unhitched trailer right behind it.  The trailer continued going straight.  It hit the curb and made a ninety degree turn and headed to the other curb.  That's where I landed and stopped in a crash.  The van that was pulling the trailer just kept on going down the street.  I pulled the van over and ran up to a hysterical woman on the phone to the police.  To cut to the point, the woman's gate was being stolen when she came up on her house and saw this guy and another guy taking it.  She confronted the guy, he pushed her and then got into the truck and started to drive away.  She followed him.  The guy started to bolt, the trailer came unhitched, and that's where I came in.  With the description of the truck the police quickly put out an all points bulletin.  A few minutes later they were taking the woman down the road to ID the possible perps.  Good job, cops.  With that I drove away, off to continue my route.

After arriving home I checked my work email and found the above email.  It's an invitation to Maleficent's retirement dinner.  These dopes have the temerity to ask us to pay $50 to attend a horrible dinner with a total dope.  No thanks.  In the morning I was asked to sign her retirement card.  Oh I signed it.  I wrote, "Thanks for everything," and signed it "Jose."  Fuck this shit.  No way anyone is going to this shit.  But maybe that's the point.  I had a thought that perhaps the idea of making people pay for the "privilege" of having dinner with Maleficent was to keep the riffraff out.  I told TheGirl about the dinner and having to pay.  She told me that years ago when the former director retired they catered the event.  Yeah, that's more like it.  I'm not going to that fucking Nazi dinner.  No way.

Fri May 25, My cousin's kids showed up super early this morning.  Motherfucking shit!  I'm so tired of these stupid early arrivals!  I'll be glad when Summer starts and I'll have a break from these early morning starts.  In two weeks school will be on break.  After they come off break I'll be starting Glendale early, so at least three days a week I won't even see them.  Fucking 7am!  That's just fucking rude.

Today's route had me going all over Glendale, as usual, but I also had to go to Pasadena and then Sun Valley.  And yet I still finished on time.  I am still not feeling well about Monday's little meeting at San Marino.  To the point that it's affecting my attitude at Glendale.  Boy, I definitely need to move on from both of these so-called jobs.

As I drove on the freeway on my way to pick up a print job in Burbank I noticed smoke in the distance.  It was hard to tell where it was exactly from where I was.  Also, I was trying not to crash the van into a car at the time.

I was sitting in my backyard chilling when I heard several helicopters flying over my head.  In the distance I could also hear police sirens following the helicopters.  I opened up an app on my phone that listens to police scanners and found the chase.  Soon enough I saw that it was also on the news.  I followed it while chatting with my friend online.  I was giving her updates here and there.  I also went and got my new camera cable and camera to test it out.  Yes, it was an exciting Friday night.

Sat May 26, Out of the blue MontereyGirl sent me a text (above).  I have zero interest in texting her back.  I've been burned by her over, and over, and OVER, again.  No thanks.  I'm done.  She needs to move on.  I know I have.

My aunt uses my old iPad to communicate with her sister in Mexico.  I've basically given the iPad for her to use for that purpose.  For the last couple of weeks she's tried to FaceTime my other aunt.  But each time they try to talk my aunt in Mexico says that she can't hear my aunt here.  Tonight we called her using my phone, and sure enough they could hear my aunt.  Which meant that the iPad's microphone doesn't work any more.  I decided there and then to buy my aunt an new iPad.  It's arriving on Thursday.

Sun May 27, I woke up early today and so did my aunt.  Because of that we ended up going to breakfast early and I dropped her off at my Godmother's early as well.  That meant that even though I went to the store for an errand I was still very early to work.  I decided to park across the street, like in the old days, and take a nap.  My contempt with certain people who reside in this building across the way is at such a level that I don't want to be inside the building any more time than necessary.  I told myself that I would not give a single bit more of myself from this point forward.

In the past I would go in early on a Sunday and get the computers ready, and open up the study area in the back.  No more.  No more of that stupid shit.  Not until I'm actually on the clock.  This is the monster they created when they shit on my face last week.  This is the monster that they get... a person that doesn't care one bit.  A person that will never again go above and beyond.  This is the monster they created.

There was a point years ago that I wanted to be on the reference desk to show my "stuff," aka knowledge.  I made it and now I just don't want to be at that stupid San Marino job.  They gave me a chance, so I will always be grateful for that.  But their blindside last week still hurts.  It was a slap in the face of everything I do there they don't know about.  The little things I don't even want to claim credit for.  But now, I don't want to do them.  I don't want to help them.  I don't want to go above and beyond.  I just want to go in there and finish and go home.

I was sitting in my room, just enjoying doing nothing, when my aunt comes in and tells me that she wants me to go get a couple of pizzas.  ARGH!  The only thing I wanted to do today was nothing.  Nothing at all.  Tomorrow starts a shortened week at work, which are never good.  But I had no choice to go out and pick up the pizza after ordering it online.  I so didn't want to do anything today, but of course it's too much to ask for.

Wed May 30, I checked my social media this morning and found something very interesting in my "like" folder (see above).  I knew instantly that it was Michelle Cayada.  She fucked up with one main thing... using my name.  I don't post my name on my Instagram account profile page.  So there isn't any way that a common person would know my name unless they already knew me from "real life."  Aside from that, she is using an account she showed me way back in the past.  I'm insulted that she thinks so little of my intelligence that she does these things and thinks I wouldn't instantly know that it was her stalking me.

There was a point in the day when I was summoned to the circulation desk by one of the clerks that was left alone.  TheWish was supposed to be on the desk, but she wasn't there on time.  In the mean time I went to the circulation desk to help my fellow coworker.  As I was helping a patron TheWish came rushing in.  She went straight to the back room and then emerged a few seconds later.  When she walked by me she walked her fingers up my spine.  Oh.  I'm a big HUGE dummy when it comes to: women, love, romance; relationships, understanding women, interpersonal relationships and everything in between.  However... HOWEVER... I know that a woman physically touching you means at the VERY LEAST that she doesn't find you to be totally repugnant.  I know, that's a VERY low bar.  However, I do have a tiny bit of history with TheWish.  I did ask her to dinner last year and she didn't automatically refuse.  She's not the type of girl that would just go with me out of pity.  Or at least I think she isn't that kind of human.  Whatever, we have tiny history where I fed her.  Now my buddy, Vagabundo, also likes TheWish.  Of course it feels like there's unfinished business with TheWish.  Despite the fact that I don't feel there is, other than explaining why a relationship with me would just end in doom.  (Because I'm horrible at relationships, and I just don't have the energy to pursue a relationship.) Oh man.  I want my buddy to be happy.  Be it with TheWish or with any other lady.  He deserves it.  I think he and TheWish would make a nice couple.  Buuuuutt, it does hinge on TheWish liking my buddy back.  All I know is that she walked her fingers up my spine today... and that felt nice.

I don't have to repeat myself here, but I have a bit of a crush on LaFlor.  I think she's pretty.  Any interaction with her makes me feel good.  Today she and I were talking about how my buddy Vagabundo wears gloves when he is paging.  LaFlor mentioned that she wouldn't mind wearing gloves.  I told her that at Glendale I always wear gloves, and that I could give her a pair of gloves.  I went to my office and took the pair I had there and gave them to her.  I used the moment to compare hand sizes.  That was nice.  Lightly touching her is nice.  I did the faux punch move on her earlier, JUST to have an excuse for touching her.  In short, I gave her gloves because I'm attracted to her.

Dinner with TheGirl is always good.  Not much to say about that.  There's a man that dresses like a woman that also goes on the nights we have gone to the restaurant.  I had a couple of shots of whiskey even before we arrived at the restaurant.  And then on top of that I had a couple of margaritas.  Good food.  Anyway, when I'm feeling nice and tanked of course I become brave.  I told TheGirl that we should go up and say hi to the he/she.  But, I didn't.  Maybe next time.

Thu May 31, When I arrived this morning there were a few guys outside the building using a pressure washer on the building.  My first thought it, what took this so long?  The library has been reopened after the renovation for over a year now, and it's just now being washed?  I mean come on.  I guess better less than never.

The funny thing was when the washers sprayed water on the windows on the east side of the building some water started to come through.  It was leaking through the bad seals.  I couldn't help but laugh.  The circulation staff called up to administration and in a few minutes Maleficent was in circulation to inspect what was going on.  She looked and then left.  Before I could leave for the route there was already a guy from the city at the door to mitigate the "damage."  Good job, dopes.

When I went to city hall and of course there were a bunch of boxes waiting for me in the graphics department.  ARGH!  Ten boxes of "family events" for the library.  Everyone has been asking for these stupid "family events" flier.  And of course these dopes waits until the last minute to print them.  Typical.  Today I picked them up, and supposedly tomorrow I'll have to distribute them to the branches.  But, then Jade mentioned that the fliers were sitting upstairs in administration as of this evening.  And here's the thing with that.  I didn't want the boxes in the van through the entire route.  I just wouldn't have the room.  This is why I went right back to Central right after picking them up from graphics.  So they had the fliers since this morning.  Not sure if they will be going out tomorrow.  Especially since it's June 1st tomorrow and people at the branches have already asked for the events of the month.

The rest of the route was fine.  One of my coworkers told me that she was laid off from her other job with the school district.  Yesterday was her last day.  They blindsided her, because they were saying they were for sure going to keep her.  But, then they let her go yesterday.  Nothing is OK these days.

I checked my San Marino work email and found the staff meeting minutes.  I didn't go to the meeting, because fuck that shit.  In checking the minutes I came across the above paragraph.  I sent it to P via text and called it the "P rule."  She was telling me earlier this week that she had covered for a H and that she now wanted to "make up those hours" she missed when she swapped.  Well, the circulation manager told her no, via email.  P was not happy.  But it is the correct decision since she swapped.  If she had not swapped I would have thought that the circulation manager would have said yes to her working her regular hours and her coverage hours.  Oh well, this is definitely another shot across the bow.  In the past they had no problem with people swapping and still working to make up those hours "lost."  But, I guess that's over now.

I took this picture while traveling through Solvang on my way up to Carmel earlier in the year.  The Succulent Cafe is one of my favorite places to eat while in Solvang.  This is a photo is of one of the many signs on the walls at that cafe.

I went to Downtown Disney a few weeks ago.  One of my favorite places to have a drink is the Hearthstone Lounge.  I usually have a Manhattan, but this time I asked for straight whiskey.

While traveling up the 2 freeway I took a picture of the clouds above the mountains.  Clouds are pretty cool.

I didn't have any other place for this, so I'm putting these here.

This is a photo of a former coworker of mine.  She posts many photos of her pets online, but then once in a while she will post something like this.  I remember asking her out and of course she said no.  She had, and has, a nice figure.  Alas, it wasn't meant to be.  But, I did want to keep this here for posterity.