This month has had more than its share of ups and downs.  It's certainly had some good times and bad.  I guess that's what this month so interesting.  On to the update.

Wed, July 1, Class today was good, but at the same time it reminded me why I'm not doing this any more.  The seniors I teach don't learn.  Maybe it's because you can't teach an old dog new tricks, or maybe I'm bad at this.  Whatever the reason, I'm done.  I mean I'm really done.  It's been long enough.  They can ask me about computers and tablets while I'm on the desk from now on.

I had lunch at a taco joint up the street.  I was going to get nachos, but I seemed to remember that the nachos weren't that good last time.  But, I actually don't remember for sure.  But to play it safe I didn't order nachos.  I ordered a taco plate.  Lunch hit the spot.  Better than the slop that I've had lately.

Dinner with TheGirl was nice tonight.  I can't remember what we talked about.  Just general stuff.  Mainly I told her about the power going out at work on Sunday.  Aside from that there isn't much to talk about.

Thu, July 2, Work was pretty tiring today.  Not only did I have to do the route, but I also was told that I would have to move some furniture from one of the branches to central.  All by myself, mind you.  I didn't complain about the assignment, but it was a shitty one that I wasn't looking forward to.  Thankfully MicroManager said that the woman in charge of coordinating the sale said I didn't have to move the furniture after all.  It turned out later that Snow and this woman agreed that it was too much for one person to do.  And it really was.  The stuff they wanted me to move is heavy to deal with even if two people are involved.  Still, the heat sapped my energy today.  I tried to conserve as much energy as possible, but it was still a tough work day.

I had a long interaction with Snow today.  When I came into the branch she said she was sorry about not responding to my email about Disneyland.  I knew she was going to do this.  She told me a long story about how she doesn't go to Disneyland during the summer.  Which I do understand, but still.  That's a whole month and a half that is taken advantage of on the calendar.  She said that come September she would be happy to go.  We'll see about that.  My buddy and I were trying to figure Snow out and we came up with a theory about her niceness.  We think it's a shield.  A shield in that she puts it up when she doesn't want to deal with things.  Kill them with kindness, I guess you can plainly state it.  She knows sugar sweetens things, and her move is to get out of conflict by using sweetness.  Who is the real Snow then?  Of course even the shield version of Snow is somehow real in the sense that it's her outer self.  She is that person, as much because she projects that to others.  But also because she has to exist in that facade.  No one can be pretend to be something that they are not for very long.  So this shield is still Snow, in a way.  It's a polished version of Snow, an idealized external representation of the flawed human inside.  Not a horrible thing, many of us go through life wearing a mask.  As my buddy says, at least her facade is nice.  Especially in a den of vipers.

As far as our actual interaction, she and I talked about Disneyland.  Then she kept popping her head into the break room.  I talked to her about books, and asked if she had any suggestions for me.  She did, and I wrote them down.  She even gave me a book on CD.  It's a book about Charles Darwin and his wife Emma.  Found out it's a bit of a love story.  Damn Universe.  Snow is quite pretty.  She never really entered the room, by the way.  The above photo was typical of our interaction.  Whatever.  I'm not going down this path again.  I'm not falling for the sugar.  I'm going into this with my eyes wide open.

Following work I hung out with my buddy Vagabundo.  We went and bought sopes at a local place that makes them good.  We came back to my place and talked about Snow, and watched the last episode of Mad Men.  It's funny how much was made of the fact that the main character went to Big Sur.  It was a minor thing, and the show had an abrupt end.  Good time was had.  That was until....

When I was going to CSUN I met a good guy named Paul.  We were classmates, not really friends in the real sense.  Still, good guy.  Vagabundo told me tonight that he died.  He had cancer.  Fucking crap.  He's Vagabundo's contemporary, not mine since I was going to school when I was in my late 30's.  Still, it hit me when I was told he was dead.  Here's a guy, probably ten years my junior, and he's already dead.  I don't know what it all means, but certainly the old cliches about life being too short, and we must make the most out of every day, apply here.  Yet, we already know that.  What we forget to say is that life is not fair.  It's actually quite unfair.  Here was a good man, loved by many, and that didn't help him survive cancer.  It certainly didn't help my Mother or Grandmother.  It never helps anyone.  Because there is no help for pain in this world.  Those who reach out to an imaginary God finally know there is nothing at the end.  It does them no good at that moment.  One has to know it as early in life as they can handle it.  I know it.

Fri, July 3, I did as little as possible today.  I had this grand plan to go to Santa Barbara and visit the botanical garden there.  I asked TheDesire, and she said she was busy.  That popped my balloon, and made me want to just sleep-in today.  After the drinking last night I was even less inclined to drive out to Santa Barbara.  I think I might go next week instead.  Less traffic, for sure.  Whatever.  Once TheDesire didn't want to go it made me less likely to go.

I was watching the show Daredevil today and the following quote perfectly fits, because it talks about the kind of people I have to deal with every day.  People who think the rules don't apply to them.

"'You get what you deserve'.  It's an old saying. One that survived the years, because it's true.  For the most part.  But not for everyone.  Some get more than they deserve.  Because they believe they aren't like everyone else.  That the rules, the ones people like me and you, the people that work and struggle to live our lives, just live, don't apply to them.  That they can do anything and live happily ever after, while the rest of us suffer.  They do this from the shadows.  Shadows that we cast.  With our indifference.  With a pervasive lack of interest in anything that doesn't directly affect us, we, in the here and now.  Or maybe it's just the shadow of weariness.  Of how tired we are, struggling to claw our way back to a middle class that no longer exist, because of those who take more than they deserve.  And they keep taking, until all that's left for the rest of us is a memory of how it used to be before the corporations and the bottom line decided we didn't matter anymore.  But we do.  You and I, the people of this city we still matter."

Sat, July 4, I had this notion that I would try and do something today.  But I don't have the energy to do anything.  I just want to stay home and chill.  Especially since my Aunt left me alone in the house.  I don't have any alcohol in the house, so I can't drink.  But as I sit here writing this I could jerk-off, or watch TV, or write, or even work on my photographs.  I've said it before, I'm just tired of everything.

I received an email Thursday that I forgot to mention.  It had to do with my art submission to the Brand library.  Apparently I made the first cut.  Means nothing unless I made the final cut.  At least this time I made the first cut.  All of the previous attempts have proved to be futile.

TheDesire appeared on a video produced by the city of Glendale this week (pictured above).  She showed the fair citizens of the city how they could learn another language using one of our apps.  Good job, TheDesire.  She's too cute.  She did need to comb her hair though.  She's nice.

My buddy Dane sent me a text this morning to say that he broke the tablet that I bought him just barely two weeks ago.  His cart hit something and the stuff fell on the ground, including the tablet.  He says that there's a line on the screen.  I'll see it on Monday, but this definitely means I can't buy him anything.  I felt bad for him, and I bought him the most inexpensive tablet I could find.  So yeah, it's not a big hit to my wallet.  But at the same time I didn't think that less than three weeks later he would break the damn thing.

My neighbor's house is still up for sale.  I haven't noticed anyone coming up to the house to check it out.  Nor have I seen any open house signs around the neighborhood.  I did check the price when it was listed, and it was a crazy $776,000.  Today I looked out the window and thought about how I never see anyone here and wondered if it was still listed.  Sure enough, sign is still up outside and the realtor's website still has it listed.  The price went down though.  It's now listed at $599,000.  Hmm, wonder how low it will go.

Sun, July 5, Work today was the usual Sunday bullshit.  After job one I went to job two to get the book drop with my coworker.  That only took us an hour.  I made some extra big bucks.  Dane was outside the library, using the wifi.  After finishing up with job two I went outside and talked to my buddy.  He showed me the cracked tablet I bought him not more than three weeks ago (pictured above).  He told me he took a misstep and dropped his rolling luggage.  That's how it broke.  At the same time, I don't care how it was done.  It's done.  I spent about $50 on that tablet.  Not a lot.  I wanted to spend more.  Imagine if I had given him my old iPad.  Or if I had bought him a nicer tablet?  Oh no.  I work hard for my money.  Buying him that tablet was meant for him to get over the fact that someone stole all his electronic stuff.  But having broke it SO quickly, I have decided to not buy him anything for a long time.  If ever.  That $50 could have gone towards my home owners insurance.  Or it could have bought me two bottles of booze.

I stupidly called MontereyGirl tonight after work.  We talked for a few minutes about how we have been since we last saw each other.  She still doesn't remember us making out.  But, perhaps she does.  She's pretending she "imagined" it, because she was drunk.  Let her imagine.  Of course I was "imagining" that it was TheDesire I was kissing at the time.

Speaking of TheDesire, I will often look up at the clock and see that it is 11:11.  In my life it is significant because it means TheDesire.  {explain here} I know these coincidences mean nothing to the Universe.  They only mean something to me.  But yes, they mean something to me.  I love TheDesire.  I want to be with her for the rest of my life.  But, I'm not going to sit here and just wait for her to finally come to her senses and be with me.  I'm going to live.  And I'm going to purge my mind of any romantic thoughts with her or any other woman.  I've said it before in the past, but it's time to just give up.  There is a time to fight, and I'm done with that.  I just want to make art.  I just want to capture the beauty of Big Sur in my photography.  Nothing else.  So let TheDesire reject me.  Let every woman I've felt anything for reject me.  Snow.  TheGirl.  Everyone of them.  I'm done.  My goal is to purge myself of all that by the time I travel up to Big Sur.  I know I can do it.  I will do it.  Mark my words.

I just looked and I will work twenty-seven days straight from July 19th to August 14.  That is a long time.  It might be the longest period of time working straight through that I've ever had to do.  To be sure, many of those days will be easy.  But some will not.  Certainly not route days.  I guess it's better than being home.  And on some of those days I plan on going to Disneyland.  Fuck everything!

Mon, July 6, Well, another one bites the dust.  I sent that girl I was going to go to the museum with a couple of weeks ago a text.  Well, of course the whole deal is now soured.  She says she has other plans.  Fucking shit.  I can't win.  These are the last punches in a fight that I've lost.  It's a done deal, the score cards don't favor me.  I don't have it me to fall to the canvas, but I lost this fight.  I won't get knocked out, but I'm getting bloody, and I'm getting hurt.  This beating proves that it's time to just walk away.  It's time to just put up the gloves for good.  Done.  I can't say it was a bad run, but it wasn't a very long run.  My romantic life spanned only a decade and a half really.  Less.  And now it's over.  I did love it while it lasted.  Such, is life.

When I arrived at job one my boss said that she was leaving early because her son had tried to commit suicide.  I couldn't believe it.  He's on one of those 72 hour watches, to make sure he doesn't try it again, I assume.  Crazy.

The rest of my day was basically uneventful.  Nothing to really report here.  Oh, wait, I just remembered.  TheGirl gave me keys to her place.  I never asked for them, nor did I actually desire them.  However, as she said, after over a year she finally got me some keys to her place.  It will help facilitate our Wednesday night dinners.  She can walk the dog, go about her business, and not worry that her keys are going to be taken from her car tire.  Which is where she leaves them when I come over, in order to have me be able to get into her place.  She still cares, huh?  Yeah, whatever.  Love is for suckers.  I just want to make art.

Tue, July 7, I'm so very tired these days.  I work too many hours a day and it's catching up with me.  Still, there are nice moments during the day.  Today LaFlor was working.  She's looking cute again.  She worked the desk.  I flirted with her a little.  She asked me about my photos, and I showed her my website.  Not this one!  She was impressed.  It would be nice if that bought me some brownie points with her.  Still, it was nice to flirt with her today, kinda flirting.

Just as I was leaving work I noticed a call from MicroManager on my phone.  On my voicemail she said that she wanted me to start work early.  She didn't say why, but when I arrived after calling her back I found out that it was to move a bunch of books in preparation for the upcoming renovation.  She had me start an hour earlier than usual.  I moved a bunch of books to their new location.  Most of the books are going to be moved, then some others are going into storage.

As I came into job two early I saw TheDesire talking to the Children's librarian.  TheDesire's body looked SO fucking good.  Not going to mince words.  Physically I still desire her.  In my purse of emotions that I need to make I aim to not want TheDesire, or any woman, in a romantic sense.  Mainly because I don't have a chance at finding love, so why follow that futile endeavor?  I'm done.  Still, she did look good today.  She's a pretty girl, looking pretty.  My response is a natural one.  I find her attractiveness to mean that she's fertile, and that makes me respond with a physical and emotional feeling.  Simple as that.  Still... she is nice.

As I write this I will freely say that I've had a good shot of whiskey.  I looked at that picture of Paul, my classmate from CSUN.  I think that his death just hit me because of the fact that it has not quite been ten years since I met him.  I started school in the Fall of 2005.  And here it is the Summer and he's dead.  What would I do if I only had a decade left to live?  Would I go five years and do whatever, and then go nuts the last five years?  Who the fuck knows.  See, we don't know when we're going to die.  My mother never looked at any calendar and said, "Oh, some day way in the future on March 16th I'm going to die."  Nor did my Grandmother think the same.  I could go to the calendar now and pick a random date and I would have a 1:366 chance of being right.  Wait.  Is that correct?  Don't ask me, I'm drunk.  You get my point.

Wed, July 8, I drank like a fish last night.  I'm not even sure why I drank so much.  There was a moment last night where I was going to pour a shot of whiskey into a glass.  I thought that the amount in the bottle would be about a shot's worth.  But I was wrong.  It turned out to be about four shots worth.  Not wanting to pour it back into the bottle, and not wanting to toss the overage, I started to drink.  Boy did I feel it this morning.  I don't often suffer from hangovers, but I did this morning.  THAT's how much whiskey I had last night.

I'm a cad.  I have, in the past, tried to use my art to get laid.  You might say today's little flirt session with one of my new coworkers was that same trick at its start.  Time will tell if I get anywhere, of course.  But today's little flirting with the new girl is laying that foundation for getting me laid.

I had my iPad class this morning.  Even though it went well it also reminded me why I'm not going to miss doing this anymore.  In short, I'm tired of answering the same question a half dozen times in the span of five minutes.  Three weeks, and I'm done.

Dinner with TheGirl is sometimes a challenge.  I buy every other week, and that means we either go out to eat or we get take-out.  But we have a limited amount of places we can go.  That is why we tend to visit the same places.  Tonight it was bland Mexican food.  In the past it's better tastier, which makes me wonder why this time it wasn't.  Thankfully I had plenty of whiskey with me to make me forget how tasteless the food was.  We already know where we are going in two weeks.  A place called Fat Dog.  It's up the street from TheGirl's place.  Tonight I told her about the last time I was really smashed, the time I went up to CityWalk with MontereyGirl.  I was light on details, but I did make it clear that I wasn't interested in MontereyGirl.  Despite what happened.

Thu, July 9, Today was a fucking long day.  I started work at 8am, and didn't stop until 8pm.  I had an hour lunch somewhere in there, but still.  I worked eleven hours today.  Tomorrow I can't work that long, but I'm sure MicroManager would schedule me for that many hours tomorrow if she could.  Today is kinda a blur to me now.

When I arrived I encountered Snow.  She looked really pretty, as usual.  She made a joke about starting her own delivery business.  I joked back, "What, we're not good enough?"  We talked for a few more moments and she turned to go.  She gave me a wink as she left.  Damn that Snow!  Later on in the day I was able to flirt with TheDesire.  Junior saw me talking to TheDesire and told me, "Oh stop flirting."  I was hoping she would say that we were both flirting, but she didn't mention that.  still, I like to think that TheDesire does do some flirting as I flirt with her.

The Desire is moving her desk upstairs, along with the rest of the reference staff.  TheDesire's desk will be close to TheGirl's old desk.

Lastly, there's a new page working upstairs in Children's.  I'm not sure if she's a new hire or one of these kids that get hired for the Summer from some work experience thing.  I hope she's permanent, because she is fucking hot.  The first thing you notice is how huge her boobs are.  I mean they walk in the door about a minute before the rest of her does.  And she's pretty.  It's hard to tell from the above picture, since I did a screen cap of a video I took on my phone, while in a dark parking structure.  It would definitely be nice to get to know her better.

Fri, July 10, Today was another long day at work.  MicroManager signed my time card for today and tomorrow, since tomorrow is the end of the pay period.  Her minion will take care of the time cards tomorrow, I'm guessing.  I continued with the book moving, while my buddy drove the van.  I will have worked 39 hours in the last three days.  THAT is nuts.  No wonder I'm so tired.  But tonight I had something I was looking forward to.  Nothing would keep me from enjoying myself tonight.

More on that in a bit.  TheDesire was on the desk part of the day.  I do like her a lot.  She looks cute in a pair of jeans.  We chatted a bit while she was in the stacks.  She gives me that smile and I just melt.  It's fucking ridiculous how I feel about her.

Dinner was good.  I had three cocktails, and she had two.  I think she liked that I dropped a pretty penny on her.  She told me the story of her started Friday, having to deal with police and family.  That was the theme of the night.  Didn't make me run though.  Could I handle her, physically and emotionally?  I don't know.  I guess part of me doesn't want to know.  Another part does.

After dinner neither of us was in a state to drive.  It was early yet, so we walked around.  We stopped off at a coffee joint and she bought us some cake and coffee.  Tea for me.  We talked some more, and I told her my stories and she told me hers.  She has a fuck buddy.  I would think so.  She's not the normal Armenian girl, that's for sure.  She grew up in a nice part of Glendale, among many whites.  Then an influx of Armenians came into the community.  But she wasn't really a part of their world, nor of the white world.  So she was a misfit.  Sounds familiar.  I like this girl enough to want to hang out with her again.  Can I handle her life drama?  Probably not.  But, I would still like to take her to the Hollywood Bowl next month.  Time will tell.

Sat, July 11, When I finished work tonight I went to my car and took a nap before driving home.  That's how exhausted I am after three of the longest work days I've ever had to put in at any job ever.  In the last three days I've worked, eleven, nine and nine hours respectively.  The last couple of hours were a struggle not to collapse.  I haven't been this tired in a long time.  But, at least I won't have to do this book moving for at least a week.  It also doesn't help that I stayed out so late last night.  I didn't get home until 1am.  Then I had to go to sleep, and wake up at 6am this morning.  Having that quick turn around sure didn't help me today.  I'm just glad that MicroManager didn't schedule anyone to help me the last four hours of the day.  There is no way I could have kept up with anyone else.  So I cruised the rest the last four hours after coming back from lunch.

At lunch TheGirl sent me a self portrait of her and her dog.  So I took Chan and took a picture of the two of us and sent it to her.  Her response was "Aww."  On her FB I noticed later that she was at her favorite restaurant.  They do have potent margaritas.  I'm sure she does there with TheChisel every fucking week.  I mean every week she mentions that place.  She's in a rut, but what am I supposed to do about it?  Nothing.  I'm not doing a thing about it.

My one time close friend, not distant friend, Michelle Cayada, sent me a few texts last night as I was out.  I didn't really have the inclination or the time to text her back.  I told her I was driving home, and it was late.  She understood, and the social contract kept her from texting more until this morning.  The above is our exchange.  She's finally getting married, officially.  Since she met this guy I don't know how many years ago, she's been pseudo married to him.  He's a good man, and she will be happy with him.  Why it took SO long I'll never know.  Only probably with the invite is that it assumes that I'm free at a moment's notice.  Which I'm not, these days.  I was working, and had my gloves on.  Both things that makes it difficult to text.  I told her I was busy, no explanation.  I don't really need to explain, but I know people offer explanations in situations like this.  But I didn't have the time today.  August 15th is the day I have tickets to the Hollywood Bowl.  I want to go.  I wanted to ask Snow, when I first bought them.  I may still ask her.  TheGirl, as always, is my back-up.  I thought of asking TheDesire, but she's not going to be in town the entire month of August.  As I thought about it, I went between wanting to be at the wedding, and not.  I don't like weddings.  I probably wouldn't have even shown up to my own.  I'll never have to worry about that though.  Still, I thought about how I could sell my tickets and go to her wedding.  But whatever.

Sun, July 12, Work was the usual, nothing.  It's not even worth mentioning it.  It was boring, and at the same time at least it went by fast.

The real excitement came after work.  I decided to jet down to Disneyland last week with one of my coworkers.  But, they flaked.  I reminded myself that I didn't need a companion for Disneyland.  As much fun as that might be with a friend, it's also fun to go alone.  I flew down on the freeway and was in the park by 6:40.  I usually take less time, but I had to detour my from usual 710 freeway route, thanks to construction.  I ended up going to the 10 East, then on the 605 South, followed by the 5 South.  Needless to say, by the time I arrived at the park I needed food.  I decided to get a corn dog.  Disneyland has the best corn dogs in the world.  Before going into the park I took a couple of shots of whiskey.  By the time I was inside eating I had a small buzz on me.  I walked around, but all of the attractions were busy.  I decided to replenish my buzz and went to Carthay Circle for some booze.  I ordered a Manhattan (shown above).  It had a special diamond shaped ice cube.  Pretty neat.  I followed that up with a flight of Scottish whiskey.

Fully tanked up I flew into the night and went into Disneyland again to see if I could get on some attractions.  When I crossed over from DCA I was confronted with the new night parade in full gear.  Still, I walked in the back area of the park and was able to make my way into Frontierland.  Fantasmic was in full swing.  I walked slowly to catch as much of the show as I rounded the Pirates in order to make my way up to the Haunted Mansion.  When I went a couple of hours earlier the wait was something like thirty minutes.  The second time I went the wait was nil.  When I got off I was right next to Splash Mountain.  In my state I thought about going on the attraction.  I walked to the entrance, then decided I didn't want to get wet.  But, then the want to go on was more than the worry of getting wet.  It was great.  I didn't get more than a couple of drops on me.  I finished off the night with a churro.  In addition to the corn dog I also had popcorn, which I wolfed down.  The only thing I missed was getting a Dole whip.

Mon, July 13, Mondays are always going to be Mondays.  I think that even if I had Mondays off, like I used to so many years ago, they would still feel pretty awful.  The same goes for today.  Job one was OK, job two was meh.  I went down to the lounge at Job two and saw that they cleaned out the place (pictured above).  No more lounge.

I haven't been feeling well since Saturday evening.  Actually since Friday, but I didn't feel as bad as I did Saturday.  Today I felt OK.  Still, I know I'm not 100% yet.  All these long days and long hours are getting to me.

I went over to TheGirl's after work.  We did our little visit.  I still like our little visits.  Chan was a good guy, sitting on top of TheGirl's TV.

Tue, July 14, Not feeling well.  I wasn't feeling well yesterday, but today I am not feeling well.  It's night now.  It's time for me to get some rest.  Hope I feel better tomorrow.

Wed, July 15, I wasn't feeling well last night, and I'm still not feeling well today.  It's so bad that I called out sick tomorrow.  Last night was a struggle.  I felt lousy, without any energy (where have you heard that before?).  I have to make this short, because I'm going to try and get some rest.

I woke up feeling super horrible.  But I told my buddy I would meet him at the city yard so he could get my help dealing with pumping gasoline for the van.  I somehow pushed myself out of bed and showered and met him at the city lot.  After that I went to get some food, which only partially hit the spot.  It got me going so that I could teach my iPad class.  Which thankfully is my third to last class I'll teach.  I'm completely tired of teaching that class.  Today I tried to be as patient as can be, but there's always one lady that isn't listening to what I say and then she turns around and says, where are we?  Thankfully she left early.  I'm not going to fucking take it any more.  Not with only two classes left.  I told the boss about how I'm just burnt out, and she told me she felt the same way when she was teaching a similar class.  Two more weeks!

Speaking of schedule, my coworker Tina wants me to give up two of my Sundays in order for her to work those days.  What do I get in exchange?  Ah, nothing.  Just the knowledge I am losing two day's worth of pay.  She did propose a better solution, one Sunday a month.  Now THAT I could live with.  She should let me fuck her tits in exchange, they are damn big.

Dinner with TheGirl was abbreviated tonight because of how I feel.  I ate a little food, but then when we retired to the couch I had an accident.  That put an end to the night.  I changed, but I knew I had to go home.  I came home and pooped my butt off.  As I write this it's nearly 10pm.  I feel tired, but I wanted to get this done.  I called in sick already, as I said.  I just know I won't wake up feeling well tomorrow.  And if I do, well good.  Either way, I need a day off.  These long periods without a day off are really catching up to me.  This is why I'm seriously considering Tina's offer of taking one Sunday off a month.  Hope I feel better tomorrow.

Thu, July 16, I woke up early this morning, but after texting TheGirl and my buddy I passed right out again.  Despite me feeling ill I wanted to go into work today.  My buddy was doing the driving, so I was going to be witness to the horrible events of this day.  AKA, the groundbreaking of a new era at the Glendale library.  An era of fewer books, fewer employees, and somehow more customer service.  If that sounds like an oxymoron it's because it is.  The short version of how I see this is that it's cutting out of the heart of this library.  We should serve as a model of better service, with more people helping more patrons.  Not fewer people helping fewer patrons.  But whatever, I just work there.  I shouldn't care that much.  It's just a job, right?

Today I stayed home because I'm still not well.  I knew I wouldn't be when I called last night.  But I did want to be there in a sense.  Just to witness first hand the idiocy they called progress.  I wasn't able to be there, but that's probably for the best.  It's probably better I wasn't there to ridicule.

My buddy Dane sent me the above picture, and the previous one was from a coworker's FB page.  I think it was fate that kept me from that place today.  I'm tired of the bullshit, and today I might have lost it.  My poor buddy had to take the load of the delivery though.  He felt the full brunt of being the "special" delivery driver.  He feels I probably have it easy on my route days, but I don't.  I have fewer books, it's true.  But I always get the extra stuff.  Like today, he had to go to Brand first to get something for the stage that our coworkers forgot to bring with them earlier this week.  Then he also had to go get a helium tank filled.  And then he had to go to the city yard and get some paper goods for Adams.  That's all stuff I usually do.  So yes, he had a look of what I have to deal with, and it tired him out.

I see this renovation as such a terrible thing.  Not because the structure doesn't need work, it does.  It's because of the ideas that are being crammed down our throat in the name of progress that have nothing to do with the building.  The idea of the one desk for everything.  The idea that people will use the automated check-out machines.  I've seen people use those, they are totally clueless about how to check out their books.  And we're supposed to rely on that?  The machines we use now are hardly used.  The bosses pushed and pushed the public to use them, but they mostly stand idle nowadays.  Yes, some people use them, but not as many as in the first few weeks that we got the machines and were forced to help patrons check out their books on them.  I'll just say the following.

There are so many wrongs in this world that even the most righteous of person could not hope to right them all.  No one should expect bad things from not happening.  Bad things are always going to happen.  More over, those that would cause them on purpose through their actions will ever be completely stopped.  A good person gets tired of the fight eventually, and falls, even as another evil springs up.

Fri, July 17, I woke up feeling nearly 100%.  I just needed something good to eat to get myself going this morning.  Well, like mother hubbard I had nothing in the fridge that I wanted to eat.  I ended up spooning a few bits of some tuna salad my aunt made the other day on to a plate.  I only ate about half of it.  For some reason everything my aunt makes just tastes insipid.  Not just flavorless, but actually something like an anti-flavor.  Whatever the food is supposed to be, it doesn't taste like that.  She made lentil soup last week.  In the past her lentil soup has been pretty good.  Not this last time.  Wow, just no taste.  I hardly ate the tuna salad.  I didn't feel like eating anything else this morning anyway.

As soon as I arrived at work I noticed something different.. an additional computer at the circulation desk (shown above).  That's where one reference librarian will sit answering questions, I presume.  It's another one of these constant shake my head moments I have every time I show up to my Glendale job.  Apparently one reference librarian will sit in the front helping patrons, while another librarian will sit in the back only answering phone reference questions.  Brilliant!  And by that I mean fucking bullshit!  I should really just stop caring what happens.  I should just sit back and enjoy the ride.

The route today started out strange for me, because I have not driven for two weeks.  I forgot that I had to go to Pasadena, and nearly started to fill the van with stuff intended for the route.  I got my bearings and the rest of the route was uneventful.  I got to see TreasuryGirl after not seeing her for two weeks.  She is quite a sight.  Got to see Ani, and Snow.  Snow's butt looked really nice today, and I'm sure she caught me checking it out a couple of times.  About the only thing that pissed me off on the route is this guy parking (pictured above).  There are a finite amount of none city parking spots in this particular parking lot.  Very often I'll see idiot parents picking up their kids and parking in spots reserved for employees.  This guy didn't even do that, he just made his own spot.  I saw him walk away, and even though I didn't see his parking job until after I turned the corner, I somehow knew that the asshole I was looking at had something something purely assholeish.  Sure enough, I turn the corner and I see this shit.  Of course there's never a parking enforcement officer around when this happens.  Just when I park in the same spot because the city spots are taken by idiots who shouldn't be parking there.

However, my day did end on a high note.  I got to see TheDesire twice, and talk to her both times.  I honestly think I see how see looks at me and I think it's a nice little spark there that she won't act upon.  I would have to act upon it, but I'm too much of a coward.  Our interaction revolved around her being on the cover of the local newspaper, dressed up as Curious George.  I saw the paper with the cover shown above at my last stop on my route.  I took a picture and sent her a text asking her what it was like being a monkey.  She didn't respond, not until I went upstairs by her desk looking for someone else, because I had a delivery for them.  TheDesire flashed that huge smile at me, that I swear to you means something.  She flashed it, then told me she would give the person I was looking for the envelope.  I made a joke asking if I could trust her to give it to her.  TheDesire laughed, gave me that loving look, and yeah.  Second interaction was a few minutes later when she was moving some books to the auditorium and I was in the hallway just outside of the children's room.  She flashed her smile at me, turned to open the door, and then fumbled with the lock.  She was trying to open the door using the wrong lock.  Distracted?  Sure.  Distracted because she might like me?  Perhaps.  It will be interesting working with her in a closer setting now that she's going to be on the circulation desk from time to time.  As I write this she has yet to respond to my monkey text.  She said she would "compose" something later when she wasn't so busy.  Guess I should drop all this "she likes me" talk, huh?

Sat, July 18, I don't remember the last time I had a day off that I actually went out and did anything.  Today I went out, not for long, but at least I went out and did something fun.  Today I went downtown to the Los Angeles theater for a tour.  The facade is familiar to me since I've been downtown so many times since I was a kid.  But it's also used at DCA at Disneyland.  Anyway, I woke up, my aunt made me some meh breakfast, and I drove down to downtown.

As a side thought, my aunt is retired and she doesn't have much money these days.  She gets just enough to pay the bills, and that's it.  Nothing extra.  That's what she was using the money from taking care of my cousin's kids for, to supplement her retirement check.  But, since the kids are out for the summer, she hasn't been paid since the beginning of June.  Logically she doesn't have as much money to spend these days.  This is the primary reason why there's never any food in the house.  I look inside the fridge and there is never anything to eat.  Yesterday I went to McD's for supper, and then had leftover chicken nuggets for dinner when I became hungry much later in the night.  I think I'll give her $50 bucks to buy some actual food.  I'm pretty sick of her saying, "would you like" such and such.  Such and such is usually not a well balanced meal.  I just want to lose some weight.  I need a dish that has rice and some small portion of chicken.  What I end up doing is going out to eat, which isn't good for me.

The Los Angeles theater is nice.  It's not the nicest of the movie palaces I've been to, but it's up there.  The presentation and tours were neat.  I love exploring a place like a theater.  There is so much going on behind the scenes.  The theater was said to be made to look nicer than most on Broadway, mainly because it was an independent.  Meaning it wasn't own by one of the big movie studios.  Still, throughout its history the theater did good business.  The fountain on the second floor landing was my favorite thing.

I haven't been on Broadway in a while, so I took advantage of the fact that I was only a few feet from Clifton's cafeteria to check out the progress to the building.  It looks awesome!  The facade looks like they have done a lot of good work to it.  Te last time I saw it the facade looked like a fucking mess.  Not any more.  It certainly doesn't look brand new, but it looks great.  I keep hearing that they're going to take six more months.  Whatever the time I check I online they never seem to lower that time line.  Oh well, as long as it comes back.  I miss Clifton's.

I thought of going to Disneyland, but by the time I returned to the car it started to rain again.  And hard.  I figured it would make the drive down to Disneyland a little more "exciting" than I wanted.  Besides, I'm tired.  I need to take advantage of days where I can rest and recover from all the work hours.  Hence me going home.  When I arrived I found that my aunt had left.  I ate something small, then took a nice long nap.  I didn't think my nap would turn out to be a siesta that would last a couple of hours.

Sun, July 19, Work was nothing to even mention here.  I thought about going to Disneyland tonight after work.  I even had a change of clothes.  But the rain clouds made me wonder if it was a good idea.  Also, checking the crowd app showed the park was packed.  I think I'll go next weekend.

The picture above is of TheGirl and her new car.  She goes through cars the way she goes through men.  She gets bored with cars and men.  I know for a fact that the last two cars she leased were returned before the lease was over.  Oh well, she has a new car.

I sent Snow a text asking if she could go with me to the Hollywood Bowl on August 15.  That is the same night the library is doing some bullshit.  Naturally she's the host, so no Snow at the Bowl.  Oh well, at least I asked.  I chickened out and I texted her.  I really should just quit now.  Quit trying to change things I can't change.  I must be insane.  Well, at least TheGirl is free that weekend.  I'm going with TheGirl to the Bowl.  Which is fine by me.

Mon, July 20, Nothing much to report.  Mondays suck, but what's new?  TheDesire texted me from of all places Disneyland.  She sent me the above picture.  Does it mean she was thinking of me?  Does it mean she just happened to remember me because she saw Jack?  When I asked her out on a date a couple of years back I considered taking her for our first date to Disneyland.  I would have hoped she liked it, and that it would be a regular part of our adventures, like with TheGirl.  Disneyland is important in my life right now.  It's a source of pleasure for me, in a horrid world.  I sure wish I could kiss TheDesire.  I wish I could have gone with TheDesire to Disneyland today, and that she would have invited me.  Oh well.

Chan and I had our weekly Monday night visit.  During the visit, TheGirl, who is suffering from back pain, told me that she doesn't like her new car.  What??  I mean come on.  She just got it.  From the picture she posted online she seemed to be happy.  But she drove it to work today and hated the drive.  Hated that she didn't have the fancy center display where she can respond to texts and choose the music she listens to while driving.  Have to say, if my Fit had those functions it would be pretty cool.  Still, this new car is not a great car.  It's small, underpowered, and doesn't get good gas milage.  Which is strange since it's a four cylinder.  I think that TheGirl has the same attitude with cars as she does with men.  She gets tired of them quickly.  Even a good man/car will bore her given enough time.  So she goes from one car to another, hoping to find that great car.  But she already left it in the rear view.  I think about how she left me for TheChisel.  How he had money, but other than that had no advantage to me.  He's older, and looks twenty years older than his actual age.  He's a jerk, according to TheGirl.  But whatever.  She wants to jump from one car to another, that's her business.  Supposedly she has three days to change her mind, and will be returning to the dealership to make a change tomorrow.  Shake.. my.. head.

Tue, July 21, My pseudo supervisor at San Marino had a talk with me about taking on more responsibilities in terms of what she does.  I didn't exactly jump at the change, but at the same time I see her reaching out to me because I'm a good guy.  She wants to help me out, and I'm going to take that help.  If it doesn't go anywhere it will be like every other thing I take on.  So no difference there.  But, at least she's reaching out to me.  I'd be an idiot not to take this change to learn something new.  Again, even if it doesn't go anywhere, it's a learning experience.

Wed, July 22, I'm so happy that after today I only have one more stupid computer/iPad class left to teach.  I am fucking tired of the bullshit.  I have a "student" in my current class that is always asking me, "Where are we?"  If she wasn't farting around she would know.  After next week all these dopes can go ask someone who gives a damn their iPad questions.  I'm done!

Having stayed up talking to my friend last night, and drinking like a fish, I really needed my nap today.  I felt like I wouldn't sleep, but then I turned around and boom, I was dead to the world.. and I loved it.  If only I had eaten lunch faster, I would have had more time to nap.  But, I went into the lunch room and ate.  Which just means I'll stay in there talking to my coworkers.

I had a cute patron come up to me while I was on the desk today.  She was looking for a movie.  The computer said it was available, but then when I went to look for it, it wasn't where it was supposed to be.  I hate when that happens.  Still, the girl was cute, and kinda flirty.  I think I'm OK at flirting, when given a chance.  I played it cool, but yeah, she was cute.

Dinner with TheGirl was supposed to take place at a restaurant this week.  But TheGirl injured her back the other day while walking her dog.  Don't ask me how someone does that.  I think it's stress.  Stress from this car thing where she bought a car, didn't like it, and had to exchange it.  By the way, she was at the dealer this morning getting a different car.  A new car that's similar to her old car, but with fewer bells and whistles.  It doesn't have the fancy center screen that lets her control her phone.  No more texts that pop up on the screen.  No more control of her music.  Oh well.  She wanted to change her car because she's put too many miles on it, and since it's a lease she would have to pay penalties.  She said that she did the math and she would have to pay something like $7,000 in fees.  Hence her wanting to eliminate that car.  Because of the back pain I brought some take-out.  We didn't have a topic to talk about, so much of the night was quiet.  She was also dealing with the pain.  It's just nice to have dinner with TheGirl.

Thu, July 23, I show up to work today and the reference staff is getting ready to use their new desk at circulation.  The picture above is of one of the reference librarians giving me a smirk as I took his picture.  He knows this fucking idea is bullshit.  Just look at him.  MicroManager was bitching in the back saying that the reference staff "invaded" circulation.  Ha!  She also openly mentioned how this is something she doesn't like, and that it was the boss' idea, but that she wasn't happy with it.  Too bad, sucker!  I love the idea.  I know this is going to be a source of great glee for me.  My buddy and I have fun saying this is the beginning of the end.  And yes, it's the beginning of a great end.  Ha!  I love how last week dummy Maleficent was saying that "everyone" loved the idea of the renovation.  If we did, we won't after this shit.

The route today wasn't too bad.  The weather was much nicer than it was last week.  I also didn't have too many books to deal with.  But, I had to also to pick up the stupid instruments from one of the branches.  That always adds more time the route.  And tonight I had to work at San Marino.  I didn't want to take too long with the instruments.  At my second to last stop I encountered Suzka.  Suzka is fucking nice.  Today she wore a dress that showed off her legs and her hips.  The picture above does her legs zero justice.  But of course I can't just take pictures of people when they're not looking, now can I?  Suzka is a fucking nice girl.  Of course I would like to know her better, if that were only possible.  I keep on promising her that I'll bring her chocolate.  Not that at it matters that I don't bring her chocolate since she has a fella.  And I'm not Armenian.  Still, I must say she does have a great figure.

As does TheDesire.  Though, today I checked out her ass and it was a little bigger than I remember it.  Still, I'm in love with her.  The shape of her body doesn't matter.

At last stop I figured I would combine the instruments with the regular route.  Mainly because I had to still go to job two.  If I made a special trip to my last stop just for the instruments it would take me another hour.  Meaning I would likely be late to my second job.  Thankfully I got everything done and I arrived at job two just in time to change my clothes and start work.  Not that anything major happened during my shift.  It was pretty boring actually.

Although, I nearly forgot that I had to cover the circulation desk for nearly two hours because my former supervisor didn't schedule enough people to work.  H was scheduled, but she had to devote her time to passports.  A new girl was supposed to work tonight, but she ever shown up for work.  I heard the boss say that they can't even contact her.  They also said that they were going to fire her in absentia, since she hasn't shown up to any of the training.  Double bullshit!  I love how they didn't hire my friend Jenn, but they go ahead and hire people that don't even show up for work.  Fucking idiots.

Fri, July 24, The route today was pretty chill.  I didn't have many bins to deliver, and I didn't take long at Pasadena this morning.  Which meant that I could take it easy.  When I arrived at Ani's branch I decided to take some time.  I'm going to tell you, Ani is a big girl (as you can see in the picture above).  However, she has given me more hard-ons than anyone of the pretty girls on the route ever.  I look at her, smell her, check out her ass, and I'm instantly hard.  She isn't traditionally pretty, but I'm not into tradition.  I like what I like, and I like her.  I would very much like to have her sit on my face.  Like I said, I get an instant hard-on when I'm around her.  I can't imagine I wouldn't want to fuck her brains out if she was naked in front of me right now.

And then there's Snow.  Yesterday I mentioned something about West Side Story, and today she greets me with a box set of West Side Story on DVD.  The price tag is still on the box, but she said that someone donated it.  Wow, if that's the truth it sure is a coincidence.  I still don't know what to make of Snow.  She's warm and cold, all at the same time.  I'm tired of guessing, which is why I asked her to the Hollywood Bowl this weekend.  When she said she was busy that was my answer for the rest of time.  She doesn't want me.  Then again, what woman wants me?  No woman, that's who.  There are worst things in life.  Like not living.  Like taking something that seems your lot in life and using that as an excuse to not living.  Well, I'm fucking living.  No matter what.

Sat, July 25, Finally, a morning where I get to sleep-in.  Not too late, but at least I didn't have to worry about waking up past 10am, since I didn't start work until 1pm.  I need more opportunities to sleep-in.  If only.  My aunt made me some eggs and bacon.  Bacon really hit the spot.  It always does.  I went to work and helped out with an event happening today.  I basically helped them set up their computer to connect with our projector.  Nothing major.

I worked, went home, and passed out.  My aunt woke me up with talk about my iPad.  I wasn't sure what she was saying, since I was half asleep.  Suffice to say she pissed me off.  I talked to my buddy on the phone about work stuff.  That's pretty much this day.

Sun, July 26, Work was the usual collection of dopes on the computers.  Granted, we do have really slow internet, but it does seem that these computers run super slow for no real reason.  I have to hear about it every week.  Supposedly we're go get some faster internet soon, but these idiots that come into the library use that fucking ancient browser IE.  Windows updated something and of course the older versions of the browser don't work.  A dll warning pops up and these dummies don't stop to see what it says, they just click cancel, and try to open IE again.  I wish we could uninstall IE from these computers.  If only.  Today I told one of the patrons to use another browser.  He says, "What's a browser?"  I just walked away.  Fucking shit!  I didn't know if I was going to go do Disneyland this morning.  I thought about it and thought yes.  I brought Chan along, to force me to go.  Ha!

There was an accident on the 5 that slowed me down after making good progress.  I made it to the park and was at the Hungry Bear at around 6:45.  I picked out the Hungry Bear because I wanted a burger.  They have the second best burger in the park.  The place with the best burger is packed, and requires a reservation.  I also just wanted to chill tonight.  Nothing big.

What I like about the Hungry Bear is that it is in a part of the park that is quiet and feels far away from the crowds.  The fake river is surrounded by real trees, full and lush.  This park of the park has always been my favorite, because it's tranquil even while the park is full.  Especially at this time of night, when the sun is still up, but creeping under the sea in the distance.  There are times when I wish I could just be here, and that's when I come to the Hungry Bear.  The ducks are real, and it's fun to feed them.  I've taken more than one picture like the one above.  I never tie of the ducks.  Some people ask me why I love going to Disneyland so much.  Moments like this.  Picture perfect moments that this.

On my way back to the car a encountered a family that was lost in the parking lot.  All I could do was roll my eyes, because the mother was asking her family if any of them had noted where they parked.  You would think someone would take note when the arrived.  Especially when you think of how everyone has a smart phone that has a camera.  A simple picture would be taken to see where the car is parked.  But no.  No one in this moronic family should procreate.  Sadly, this bunch of idiots are the norm nowadays.  Oh well.  Whatever.

Mon, July 27, Work was chill this morning.  That is until some idiot kid pulled the fire alarm.  Suddenly there's a siren and lights are flashing.  We all left the building.  Well, kinda.  I stayed back with the boss to shut off the alarm.  Even as we exited someone told us that some one pulled the alarm.  So, we knew it was a false alarm.  I went about silencing the alarm, though the lights were still flashing.

Everyone had to stay out for about a half an hour.  After the all clear we all went back in and did what we had to do.  Nothing spectacular.

When I arrived at job two to work I noticed a huge tarp in the middle of the stacks.  This is some serious stuff.  Work is kinda on pins and needles.  No one knows what kind of schedule we're all going to get.  The full timers know they will likely have to work the weekends.  But us part timers are still up in the air.  Most of the hours have to go to the full timers.  Part timers get the leftovers.  This is not going to be pretty.  But, Maleficent wants it this way.  It's not right, but what can we do?  Full timers get priority.  I'm afraid of what this means as far as hours.  MicroManager "promised" some Saturday hours since I'm losing Friday.  But I don't trust her.  She says a lot of things that don't come to fruition.

Tue, July 28, Working with TheDesire at circulation desk on Friday and today are among the happiest moments since I started working at that damn job.  I was sitting a few feet from her while I checked in books and a feeling of euphoria came over me like a wave.  I lingered in that happy moment until it passed a few moments later.  And then came the thought that this wonderful feeling in this hellhole was also an omen of bad news to come.  Sure enough, the bad news came quickly.

So-so texted me that she overhead MicroManager talking to the boss about how during a meeting with Maleficent she, MicroManager, was told that she had to cut more part timers hours.  I'm not sure why the backbone of the workforce there is being decimated.  It's really just because they have to protect the full timer's hours.  But the part timers do a lot of work.  Work that the full timers don't want to do.  Of course the full timers will now be forced to do actual work.  Something I'm not entirely sure they are ready to do.  They have become soft.  Like I said, the moment thinking about how wonderful it was to be working so close to TheDesire to me was mixed because it also meant impending doom.  It didn't take long for the doom to show its face.  When I was clocking out MicroManager gave me the "great" news of the night.  Those "promised" Saturday hours MicroManager was telling me she would give me are no more.  Gone.  As she put it, "All of the full timers will be working Saturdays."  My buddy knew this was coming, and predicted it.  I had a little hope that MicroManager would give me some hours.  But after today she can eat it.  I shouldn't have hoped.  Hope is the first step towards being disappointed.  Truth.

Tonight was such a mixed bag.  On the one hand it was nice to have TheDesire so close to me.  To be able to see her, and interact with her, for a two hour stretch.  But then the bad news that the only day I'm assured of hours is Thursday.  All the other potential hours are now gone.  I have to quickly think of what I will do with my Mondays, Tuesdays and Fridays.  A third job, perhaps?  Very likely.  Of course, I could ask the branches if they will need people for the expanded hours during the renovation.

Wed, July 29, Today was my last computer/iPad class ever.  Or at least for a very long time.  It went well, but part of me was just counting the minutes as they reached closer to 11:30am.  Once I was done a weight was lifted.  I won't have to deal with this shit any more.  I'm burnt out on it.  I'm glad I don't have to do this any more.  I certainly can't sit here and tell you that I'm going to miss this class.  At one time it was fun.  At one time I liked doing it.  Those days are long gone.

My desk shift was pretty quiet.  But not for the first hour.  I had to print out a poster for pseudo supervisor.  And I had to redo some wish list poster that my predecessor made.  It wasn't hard, but it was just a lot of little detail work.  I had to rush because the upstairs bosses are being pressed by the board to get this list out there.  They think that having the list will get some of these things donated.  Hmm.  The list has been up for quite a while now.  We have gotten some things donated, but that's in spite of the signs.

My buddy and I will likely lose hours at Glendale.  I thought of doing a preemptive strike and reaching out to Snow to see if she could use us at one of the two branches she is in charge of.  I figured why not?  One of her branches will be expanding hours, opening on Fridays, and will likely need people.  I wrote her an email saying both Vagabundo and I are willing to work.  She wrote me back that she doesn't need anyone right now.  But, if she needs someone that she will call us.  So yeah, another dead end.

Dinner with TheGirl was nice.  I had a lot to update her on, so we had plenty to talk about.  During dinner TheDesire texted me about how she was bored at work.  Here in that moment I was in the company of the women I loved and wanted to be with forever.  Simultaneously getting a series of texts from the women I would very much like to spend the rest of my days with, TheDesire.  It's still very nice to hang out with TheGirl.  What we had was real.  At least for me.  Tonight she once again mentioned how she's lonely.  She did make her bed.  I'm not lonely, but I do want for the company of a woman.  Yes, that sometimes just means physically.  When it comes to TheDesire it means everything, not just the physical.  I almost thought to tell TheGirl that perhaps we should hang out more often.  But I'm not entirely sure I want to go down that road.  However, I know I will end up alone.  TheDesire is the basket I've put all my eggs in, and I know there's no chance she will take me.  Maybe in some dream she would be with me.  But in reality, no.  Not going to happen.  I certainly don't see anyone else on the horizon.  As I've said many times, so it goes.  I shall be alone.

Thu, July 30, So much to report about today.  First off, today was a day filled with idiots and idiocy.  First one of the day, this dope pictured above.  On my street there are a lot of cars getting off the freeway, because we have an exit there.  Once on Ventura there are a lot of cars trying to get on the freeway.  It makes things a clusterfuck.  But, since we all have to do this every day certain moves are now common place.  Towards the top of the street, where it meets Ventura, one lane becomes two.  But this dope doesn't know that move.  She decides to ignore how all the other cars are lined up and sits right in the middle of the street.  When you see every other fucking car try to get past you on your right one would think that a light bulb would light up and you'd realize that perhaps everyone is doing this on purpose.  But no.  I knew this woman wasn't from around here when they made the left turn onto Ventura and then tried to merge right onto the far right lane.  That's what the right lane on Haskell is for, to make that wide turn to the left to the far right lane on Ventura.  Fucking idiot.  The only good thing is that her idiot move blocked all the cars and I was able to skirt by and avoid that mess.  Ha!

Upon arriving at work, well technically the parking structure, I parked and I was overwhelmed by a horrible cologne.  There was no one walking by, but I could kinda see a guy parked a couple of spots away from me.  I wasn't sure if he was the one that stunk, but I was able to confirm that when I got of the car.  Moments later the guy two spots down gets out of his car.  The smell was instantly ten times stronger.  In the picture above the guy must be at least two hundred feet away and I could still smell him.  ARGH!  What a fucking asshole.

When I reached the front door of work a cheery picker thing was in the main door.  The fix it guys were taking off the sensors that prevent people from stealing books, so that this thing could get through.  They turned off the power going to the sensors, and afterward the security guard was saying that the main doors weren't closing.  I told him it was probably because they switched off the power and that was the line for the sensor and the front doors.

The route itself was uneventful.  No crazies, nothing that major.  Snow looked cute today.  The page that works with her has a cute little body.  Today I got a eyeful of both their behinds.  Snow had stuff in her car, and was always bending to get said stuff.  And then the little page came and she went to the backdrop when I was standing by it talking to a fellow city employee.  TreasuryGirl looked nice, but I only got to see her from afar.  She was on the phone the entire time I was at treasury.  At my second to last stop Suzka looked cute.  I gave her and my other coworkers chocolate I bought when I was at Disneyland this weekend.  They liked.  My other coworker's body looked so fucking crazy nice today.  Her boobs were huge, and her butt looked really nice.  Her butt always looks nice, but it looked particularly nice today.  Last stop was where K works.  She popped out of her office to ask for my cell number.  She apparently lost her old phone and she didn't back it up, and now has to go around asking people for their contact info.  Her butt looked big, but not in a bad way.  However, it is getting to that point where it's getting into giant territory.  I wonder if K is trying to get pregnant.  TheGirl told me long ago that when she was to get married she told TheGirl that she would wait about a year to start trying to have a kid.  Well, it's been longer than that.  Oh well.

Lastly, when I was done and tired I drove the van across the street to the parking structure, only to find some idiot was parked in the van's spot.  I quickly found the security guy from the parking lot, but he was zero help.  As I talked to him I saw that the parking enforcement lady was across the street getting people to move from a no stopping zone in front of a store.  I told her about the car and within a couple of minutes she was giving the car a ticket.  Fucking yes!  I felt great to finally get one of these assholes who park in the van's spot.  It's not easy dealing with these dopes on the road, but then I come back to home base and I just want to park the van and finish my day.  But that's too much to ask.  These fools see an open parking spot and never once question why this space is clear.  I mean, is it that every other person didn't want to take it?  Hmm, I wonder why that would be?  Could it be that it's a reserved spot for someone?  Yeah, because the big sign in front of it doesn't show that.  I tell you, I'm glad I got this guy a ticket.  Not only did he/she park in the van's spot, but they backed into it.  What a dick move.  I always want to deflate these people's tires, but better yet, let's make them pay a fucking ticket.

I know I said lastly, but I just remembered something.  I'm going to be on TV.  Glendale TV, which is barely TV, but still.  I'm going to be a star, again.  TheDesire and I are going to talk about library things tomorrow after I finish my route.  They want me to talk about how to go about borrowing iPads at the library.  The guy in charge of this says I'll just have to do about forty seconds worth of info.  Pretty sweet.  Plus, I get to work with TheDesire on this.  Woo!

Speaking of TheDesire, after work she texted me and asked me if I knew anything about MicroManager being racist.  I've heard stories of her saying things about Armenians, but I've never been witness to it directly.  TheDesire now spends a lot of time in circulation and overheard her say something about, "These people."  TheDesire felt that she was talking about Armenians specifically.  She went ahead and talked to her supervisor, who then talked to the circulation supervisor.  Who went ahead and defended MicroManager by saying that she wouldn't say something like that.  Ah, don't say that.  Go ahead and ask MicroManager first.  Then open your mouth.  He played it all wrong.  TheDesire said she was angry.  I don't blame her.  What I do like about this is that TheDesire has been able to see and hear first hand how terrible MicroManager is at her job.  I told her how she gets one of the other full timers to do her job (enter time cards into the computer, and do the schedules).  TheDesire said she was going to talk to MicroManager tomorrow.  Should be interesting.  Very interesting.  Mwahahaha!

Fri, July 31, Last day of the month was quite eventful.  First the route.  It was the typical Friday route.  I was able to take a nice long break at my last stop.  I cut my lunch hour in half and only did half at Grandview, and second half at my last stop.  It's a nice rest, but I wish I had a chance at resting earlier in the route.  Oh well.  I nearly forgot to mention dealing with having to park in a different spot last night.  Thanks to dummy that parked in the van's spot I had to park the van further down the parking structure.  I found a spot, but this morning it was hard to get out of that spot because of the cars behind me.  ARGH, I had to make a seven point turn, at least, to get out of there.  Assholes that park in the van's spot are going to get it now.

For some reason MicroManager was aching.  She couldn't walk.  I didn't see her standing up the entire day.  She event old me to go get the money from the safe myself, because she couldn't move.  Fine by me.  She also talked to me about scheduling.  It looks like the other driver is not going to drive on Tuesdays.  That means I get that day on the schedule.  She also wants me to work in the evenings.  She also asked me about Saturdays.  Looks like Saturdays are back on the table.  She asked me if I could work three hours on Saturdays.  I told her that five or four would be better.  She agreed to give me four hours on Saturday.  Basically they need someone to cover the lunch hours that day for when the full timers go to their lunch.  This schedule is not set in stone.  For now it's what it is, speculative.  However, the closer we get to August 31st the more set in stone it will be.  For now, it means that I will work Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday at Central.  The only day I would have to modify at San Marino would be Tuesday.  I wouldn't show up on Tuesday at all.  I could consolidate those four Tuesday hours and do them on Monday.  That way I could not only still get the same amount of hours, but I can still visit TheGirl after work.  Yes, that's a priority to me.  Now I could even get there earlier, and leave earlier.  I always suspect that I keep her from going to bed earlier with my visit.  Now I can fix that.  At least for a little while.  This schedule change would only be for the about six months.  I could live with that, right?

Just before the end of my route, and before taking a nap at my last stop, TheGirl texted me reminding me that today would have been our fifth anniversary.  Course we never made it to our second anniversary really.  That was the year I first went up to Big Sur.  We celebrate it now as the beginning of our friendship.  I'm not so sentimental about our relationship nowadays.  When it ended the first time it hurt like nothing else.  But the years have healed that wound.  She might be feeling more sentimental since she's not in a relationship now.  Oh well, she broke it off, not me.  We could have easily made it twenty years.  Oh well.

After the route I cam back to Central and changed my shirt in order to do my part for a video that will be shown on the government channel.  I was to tell people about checking out an iPad so they can read ebooks.  I busted the short segment in about ten minutes.  Then I went downstairs to shoot some "B" roll.  The segment will probably run something like thirty seconds when all said and done.  I hope this becomes a semi regular thing.  Especially if it means working with TheDesire.  Damn I like that girl.

Wrap-up, I have to say that this month has been a mixed bad.  I think it's the extremes of it all.  The highs were nice, and the lows were low.  What I'm trying to say is that a week ago I would I have that this was a meh month.  Now it's not so cut and dry.  Hanging out with Ani, working with TheDesire on the same desk, visiting the Los Angeles theater, and going to Disneyland several times were highlights.  The lowlight are the cut in hours, the stupid renovation, and the overall feeling of impending doom.  Because of that I will give this month a B.  At least it wasn't boring.